


Backwards

by Caseycuervo



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Explicit Language, M/M, Sexual Content, awkward humor, ridiculous for ridiculous sake
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-08
Updated: 2014-03-07
Packaged: 2018-01-14 23:55:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1283491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caseycuervo/pseuds/Caseycuervo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Reposting, I accidently deleted the story...T.T...chapter 4 is new.) </p><p>Heero finds out about Duo having a crush on him in a round about way, which leads to an awkward first date.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Backwards

Changing in the locker room after a rigorous workout, Duo braided his clean damp hair, sneaking quick glances at a freshly showered Heero Yuy who's tan sculpted body was sprinkled with beads of dripping water. Heero didn't notice his best friends' surreptitious glimpses as he slipped on fresh dark-blue boxer briefs and towel dried his moppy hair. The two partners continued dressing in the noisy Preventer locker room, not paying much attention to the conversations around them until two men in the next row began talking about **them**.

"God, did you see the way Agent Maxwell stared at Agent Yuy in the gym?" A male voice asked.

"Pft, yeah. He always ogles Yuy like that," a second voice responded.

Heero gazed at the ceiling, listening intently. Duo froze, petrified half way through braiding his hair.

"Does he really? I mean he was staring at the guy like he was a piece of meat," male voice number one stated, sounding slightly disgusted.

The second male added, "Yup, all the damn time. Funny thing is, Yuy never seems to notice."

Jerking his head to the left, Heero gawked confused at his best friend. Duo returned the gaze from his side vision, only he wasn't confused at all, he was terrified.

"Rumor has it that Maxwell has had a crush on Yuy for like, ever," the second voice chuckled. "Too bad, too. Maxwell is a good lookin' guy. He could get any gay dude here, but he lusts after his best, straight friend."

Grabbing his shirt, slamming his locker shut, Duo picked up his keys and wallet from the metal bench, and ran from the locker room, not caring to finish his signature braid. Heero watched stunned as Duo bolted, blushing bright red, face skewed with misery.

 

Searching high and low for his violet eyed partner Heero checked their shared office, Trowa's and Wufei's office, the underground shooting range, _and_ the cafeteria. That had been his best bet. Duo was known for being a bottomless pit, he could consume copious amounts of food. In a last-ditch effort, the messy haired man checked Une's office.

As he barged in his Commander glared up at him from her desk, baffled.

"Can I help you, Special Agent Yuy?" she questioned.

"Has Duo been here?" He demanded.

"No. Now if you will, please, get out of my office."

Stalking out of the office Heero raced to the parking garage. If Duo's motorcycle wasn't there, then he would know that he had left. Upon entering, he noticed the absence of the bike.

Jumping into his four-wheel drive white truck, Heero gunned it out of HQ and continued his search.

Driving all over town, Heero didn't find Duo at any of his hot spots. Not his regular restaurants, not his favorite bars, obviously not his apartment. The tousled dark-haired man was about to give up when driving past a community park, he spied the sleek black Harley. Hastily, parking his vehicle, Heero jumped from the driver's seat, and briskly walked around the man-made lake looking for his friend.

Spotting Duo sitting on a bench alone with his elbows resting against his knees, head buried in his hands, Heero wondered what to say and what to do. He had no answers. This was not his forte. He knew he wasn't bothered by what he had learned, but he couldn't understand why his best friend would "crush" on him. It was a complicated enough trying to figure out what Relena saw in him. Giving up on attempting to understand on his own, Heero approached Duo to talk about it.

"Hey," he said.

Looking up, Duo wasn't surprised Heero had found him. "Hey."

Taking a seat next to his friend, Heero let a few moments of silence pass before speaking. "Is what they said true?" he asked.

Hands dangling between open knees, head hung low, Duo couldn't lie. He nodded.

Sucking in a large breath, Heero questioned, "For how long?"

Duo snorted. "Since, I don't know, half way through the war."

"That was six years ago."

"Yup."

"You've liked me for that long?" He asked, flabbergasted.

"Yeah," Duo blurted. "But look, this doesn't have to change anything, alright? I'll get over it."

"Six years is a long time for _not_ getting over it."

"Yeah well, it hasn't been constant the whole time."

"Explain."

Sighing in defeat, running a hand through his bangs, Duo confessed, "Sometimes I like you more than others. Like when I'm dating someone, I don't like or think of you as much, but it's still there. Other times...it's just there."

"Okay," Heero bobbed his head, still not quit getting it. A few minutes of awkward silence passed between the two friends as they sat unmoving on the wooden park bench on a sunny spring afternoon.

"Why do you like me?" Heero asked.

Duo pardoned, "Why?"

"Yeah, why? I'm not the most likeable person."

"Ha, yeah I know tha-"

"I'm arrogant."

"Yeah well -"

"Definitely off-putting."

"Of course, but-"

"I've been told I'm smug."

"That doesn't-"

"And cold."

"Sort of, bu-"

"Emotionally repressed."

"Maybe a lit-"

"And I lack social grace. No one needs to tell me that, I can tell."

"Will you let me sa-"

"I'm don't talk a whole lot."

"You sure are right no-"

"I'm pretty sure my presence makes others uncomfortable."

"Oh my God, shut u-"

"I just don't understand why someone like you would _like_ someone like me _that way_."

Huffing irritatedly, Duo shouted, "Are you done now?"

"Yes."

"Would you like me to answer your fuckin' question?"

"What question?"

"Why I like you."

"Oh yes, I would like to hear that answer."

"Okay, shut up then," Duo chuckled mirthlessly. That was the longest ramble he had ever witnessed Heero complete that had nothing to do with work, missions, or mission reports. "I know you're all those things. I've known you for a hella long time, but I kinda like those things about you."

Heero's face screwed in deeper confusion. "How? How can you like those things about me?"

"Because! They're what make you, _you._ And I just like _you_. If those traits bothered me then I wouldn't like you at all."

Heero's face fell back to its reserved blank gaze as he stared at the ground. Duo didn't like that. He knew it wasn't a good sign from his stoic friend. Though Heero didn't display a whole lot of emotion, he knew that old mask, the one he used when he had to kill, was bad. It was like he used it as a numbing mechanism, a way to distance and hide himself. That lack of expression told Duo that Heero still didn't quiet understand.

"You're a lot more than the things you just pointed out, ya know?"

Heero titled his head slightly to look at the violet eyed man from the corner of his blue eye.

"You're kind, and gentle, and understanding. No one gives you credit for that, but I see it. I know that you're made up of a multitude of intricate facades...I know you harbor a great amount of sadness, self-loathing, humility which you don't show on the outside. Or try not, at least."

Grunting and crossing his arms over his broad chest, Heero argued, "What makes you think I'm any of that?"

"Because," Duo explained, "I _know_ you. I've watched you, closely. I know you better than you're probably comfortable with. Regardless, I just know you, Heero."

The two friends stared eye to eye, Duo wanting the other to see the acceptance he was offering, Heero not wanting to believe that kind of truth, trust, and honesty could exist. If Duo could see all that, all the inner turmoil, all the fake fronts and barriers to the real him, then why couldn't Relena or anybody else? She was his girlfriend, she said she loved him for who he was. So why did she seem determined to make him a new man?

An unfamiliar ping of despondency rang hard in his chest and mind.

"Do you love me?" Heero asked.

Sighing again, Duo stated, "Yeah, I love you. I love you like I love Quatre or Wufei, just a little differently. Am I _in_ love with you? I'm not sure. I don't think I could answer that."

"...is there a difference?"

"'Ro, you're shittin' me, right?" Heero just blinked at him. "Heero, there's a **huge** difference from loving someone and being _in_ love with them." Again Heero blinked, added with a shrug. "There's a lotta different kinds of love. There's platonic love, like I have for Tro, Fei, and Q. There's love for doing things. There's love for fuckin' weather! And there's the love you feel for someone who makes you feel all hot and heavy, and you want to take 'em to bed, which can grow into devotion and commitment. And when they're gone, you miss them like crazy. And when they're around you just want to make them smile and laugh and feel good!"

The mask slipping, uncertainty rising, Heero asked, "So which is it that you feel for me?"

"I'm not sure," Duo answered honestly. "I care for you more than the others, but I've never let myself go down the path of wondering if I'm in love with you...I'm not sure I want to know the answer," he finished solemnly.

Mulling all the information around in his head, Heero reflected on what Duo had said. He was devoted to Duo. Committed to him as partners, more so even. Did he want to _bed_ him? He wasn't sure. Sex was another perplexity added on top of relationships. But all this added to his lack of understanding with his girlfriend. He was devoted to her too, committed, but there were things about her he didn't like. Relena never seemed to understand him, his past, no matter how much she wanted to.

"You find me physically attractive?" He asked.

Rolling his violet orbs, Duo groaned, "Obviously. You're hot as shit, man."

"No I'm not," Heero pressed the back of his hand to his forehead and neck. "I'm my usual temperature."

"Ack! No, that's not what I meant, ugh, just, just forget it."

Realizing his error, Heero blushed a bit, but quickly squelched the physical reaction to embarrassment. Duo hadn't meant his body temperature was hot, he was commenting on his bodily features.

Turning a critical eye on Duo, the braided man felt the weight of that heavy gaze and shrunk under it. "What are you doing?" He asked.

"Appraising your physical attributes."

Slouching further on the bunch, shoulders hunched up, Duo mocked, "Thanks for not making me feel like a parasite under a microscope."

"You're far more attractive than the wiry kid I met back on the docks."

Eyebrows lifting in surprise, "Thanks...I think."

He was, very much so, more attractive at twenty-one, twenty-two? Who knew how old they really were. Duo had grown taller, surpassing Heero by a few inches. Shoulders broadened, muscle growth increased which took away from that lean, slender appearance he once had. He wasn't bulging with muscle, but carried enough to define the mature shape of a man. Some of the baby fat gone allowed the chiseled features to show through on his handsome face. The chestnut rope attached to his head was kept at the length it was during the war. Duo decided that length was long enough, if he allowed it to get any longer it would really become a real hazard. And of course there were his eyes. That strange color. Was it a stormy blue or a muted violet? They seemed to change with the lighting.

Churning his rampant thoughts over, Heero found more questions to ask.

"If..." the blue-eyed man started. "If we were, you know, together. Would you try to change me?"

A swift "No" was his answer.

"Relena says she loves me."

"I'm sure she does."

"Then why does she try so hard to change me?" Heero asked, blue eyes pleading for the harsh, slightly unwanted truth.

Duo didn't know much about their relationship. Relena and Heero had only started "dating" eight, nine months ago? He wasn't keeping tabs. Duo didn't even go to the small gatherings or parties she threw. He was rarely assigned to her guard duty. He really didn't know what Heero was talking about.

So he asked, "Tell me how she tries to 'change' you?"

"She makes me dress up for her parties, even when I don't want to go."

"Well, you gotta do stuff you don't always wanna do when you're inna relat-"

"She's always telling me to smile."

"You've got a real beauti-"

"She **constantly** asks me what I'm thinking about."

"Well, your thou-"

"She keeps asking me about my past, even though she knows I don't want to talk about it."

"Getting to know each others pasts is nor-"

"She's always correcting my manners, telling me I'm using the wrong fork. Well there's four fucking forks on the damn table! How am I suppose to know which one to use! She's always asking me why I'm not romantic, or thoughtful, or goddamn cuddly enough for her! She has this retarded, unfounded notion that I need her help to freaking function! Like I'm her own personal charity chase! Like I'm-"

"Calm down!" Duo yelled, grabbing his friend by the shoulders. Heero hadn't even realized how worked up he had gotten until Duo shook him. Again, the blank mask arose. "Heero," Duo sighed. "...it sounds to me like Relena is in love with the idea of you."

"What does that mean?"

"She loves what you represent, loves what you stand for, but not you as a person."

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Heero questioned, "You don't feel that way?"

"If I liked you that way, then I wouldn't find you're smugness, awkwardness, or critical mind endearing."

"Maybe I should date you instead," the dark-haired man muttered. Duo snorted, but Heero's mind was on a whole other roll. "No seriously, maybe I should."

"Heero we can't."

"Why not?"

"We're partners, for one!"

"So what? Let's go on a date."

"I'm not going on a date with you while you're in a relationship with Relena."

Pulling out his phone, Heero started tapping away at the touch screen. Duo didn't think much of it since his friend usually got consistent messages from their Commander. Rolling his violet eyes, Duo ignored the absurd, but normal behavior of his friend.

"There," Heero stated.

"There, what?"

"I'm not in a relationship anymore."

Disbelief dawned Duo's heart-shaped face. "Dear God, please don't tell me you just broke up with her via text message!"

"Course I did."

" **HEERO**!"

"What?"

"That's **_the_** number one worst way to break up with someone!"

"Why? It's quick, efficient, and gets the message across. Literally."

Yanking the cellular device from his friends grasp, Duo read the recently sent text. "Holy motherfuckin' shit! All you said is, 'I break up', who does that?! Or phrases it that way? Is that even a complete sentence?"

"Me? Why is that bad?"

"Ugh, it's bad on so many fuckin' levels."

"Well, what's done is done."

Phone vibrating in his hand, Duo read the response message. "Well, she replied."

"What she say?"

"She said, and I quote, 'Wow, seriously? Fuck you.'"

"See, we're over. So let's go on a date."

"NO!"

"Why not?"

"Because!"

"'Because' is not an answer."

"Look, Heero," Duo placated, "I don't think you realize what's at stake for me."

"Relatively nothing."

"No, not nothing. What if I fall harder for you? What if you don't like me _that_ way, what if I get my fuckin' heart broken?"

Standing up, Heero turned to face Duo fully. "I'm not set out to hurt you," he amended. "If we do this, and I do end up hurting you, I'll understand if you push me away, but I think it's better we do this and figure shit out."

"How? How can doing this be better?"

"Since when are you the type to back down from something?" Heero taunted. "Either you face this fear, face the possible horrid end, and go on one damn date with me. Or live the rest of your life knowing I gave you the chance, and you," Heero pointed a finger at Duo's chest, "You shot it down."

Cracking his neck in annoyance, Duo weighed his options. Sure, he could accept the offer that was being handed to him on a silver platter, but what were the consequences? Maybe he would find out that his infatuation with Heero was just that, infatuation. Or maybe the deep, unexplored emotions would arise and present his true affections. He may end up broken-hearted, but was that worse than not knowing? If he were crushed...all time heals rotten wounds...right?

"Okay," the braided man conceded.

"Tonight then?"

"Sure, I'll pick you up around seven-thirty, eight o'clock."

"Alright, see you then," Heero stated with a smirk and walked to his truck.

 

Completely, and utterly unsure of the whole god forsaken situation, Duo found himself standing outside Heero Yuy's apartment door. He had few options. One, would have been to call ahead and cancel. The other, was to go through with the impromptu date. One option that crossed his mind would never be on the docket. Standing Heero up. There was no way in hell he was going to do that. Not a chance. No existing way into, or out of hell would he do that. Heero didn't deserve that. And how could he cancel? Duo wanted this, that he knew. Wanted it more than anything, though this weird, round about way was not what he had fantasized about.

Knocking on the door, Duo swallowed his fears and got on with what he was sure to be the most interesting, awkward night of his life.

Heero flung the door open and to Duo's own surprise, he laughed at his friend. There in front of him was Heero fuckin Yuy, done up in an expensive tux as if he were going to a ball. And holding a hand full of flowers.

"What...in the fuck...are you wearing?...And what the fuck is with the roses? Seriously," Duo asked trying to stifle his chuckles.

Gesturing at his ensemble, Heero calmly proclaimed, "This is what I wear on dates...with Relena." Heero was quickly grasping the awkwardness created by his own ignorance.

"Well, you're not going out with her tonight. You're going out with me, and I don't need a bouquet of motherfuckin' roses. We aren't going to a five-star restaurant. We will be dining at the local diner this evening, sir." Duo ended his sarcastic taunt with a deep bow at the waist. "I suggest you change in to appropriate attire for this nights endeavors."

Rolling his blue eyes, tossing the red roses past Duo, Heero asked, "What the hell should I wear then?"

"Anything you're comfortable in 'Ro."

"Fine." Heero slammed the door in Duo's face. Releasing his laughter, which eased his tension, Duo rubbed his face. _/Shoulda know, ha. Course Relena would have made him where a tuxedo for every goddamn date./_ Moments later, Heero reopened the door wearing dark blue jeans and his favored green tank.

"This okay?" He asked.

"Yes. Let's go."

Of course more awkward scenarios played out before they got their meals. Heero offered to drive, insisted even. Duo made him ride on the back of his bike. Heero opened the door to the burger joint. Duo rolled his eyes at him. When Heero attempted to pull his seat out for him, Duo placed a hand and Heero's shoulder and stated the obvious.

"You know I'm not a girl, right?"

"Yeah."

"Then what the fuck are you doing?"

"I-I...uh, I," Heero stammered.

"Get grip, bro. This is our first date, you don't have to romance me."

"Okay," Heero sighed, feeling extremely uncertain of himself.

Sitting at the table, Duo strived to ease Heero's obvious apprehensions. Beginning with his usual asinine chatter was his best bet, and it worked. Heero fell into the usual rhythm of their friendship which made Duo very happy. After all, if he was to give this "date" an honest go then good, easy conversation would be a decent start. They chatted in a friendly way, ate greasy cheeseburgers with deep-fried french fries. The diner was you're typical americana classic rendition of the nineteen fifties, so when Heero asked Duo if he wanted to dance - again relying on his pervious dating experiences - Duo cocked an eyebrow.

"There's no one dancing here, and there's no a dance floor. We'd look pretty retarded dancing between the tables."

"But there's music."

"The coffee shop we go to in the morning plays music too, but you've never asked me to dance there," Duo teased.

"Those weren't dates."

"Dude, you don't have to try so hard."

"I'm not! I like dancing," Heero defended.

"Really?"

"Yes, but not that clubby kind of dancing. Real dancing."

"Okay," Duo soothed. "If we go on a second date, we'll go somewhere we can dance."

"...am I really trying that hard?" Heero asked, tearing his napkin into little shredded pieces.

"Seems so to me, but that's just because of the tux, flowers, and all the other shit you think you're suppose to do."

"You don't like those things?"

"Well, if you had just done one of them it would have been fine, but all of it was just too much for a first date, ya know?" Heero shrugged. "And if you're gonna give me flowers, gimme irises or spooned Ostespermums'."

"Spooned ozzie-"

"Ostespermum, it's a African flower. They're sweet. All funky lookin' and shit."

The rest of dinner went smoothly, Duo let Heero pay when he offered, opting to not make him feel awkward again. The braided man was picking up quickly that Heero was more than nervous. He decided to cut the night short, and take Heero home. They agreed on to go on a second date.

"Aren't you going to walk me to my door?" Heero asked.

"Do you want me to?"

"Isn't that what people do on dates?"

"Um, yeah."

Duo was a little more than anxious about walking Heero to his apartment door. Is he suppose to kiss him? Does Heero even want that? This was by far the weirdest date he had ever experienced.

In the elevator, Duo's cell rang. Heero watched his friend as his demeanour changed from skittish to pissed off.

"Hello?"

...

"Alex? Do I know you, Alex?"

...

"Are you a telemarketer, Alex?"

...

"Are you at the top of a tall building? Can you get to a roof quickly? JUMP OFF! You people are sick, go get a real job why don't you? Go shoot yourself in the fucking head. Why don't you get a knife and run into it? Alright, I'll talk to you later Alex."

...

"Fuck you mother, okay? Bye."

Duo exhaled heavily, feeling better for unleashing his nerves on an unsuspecting victim. He really did hate telemarketers, especially ones who called this late at night. Turning his head, he saw the bemused look Heero was giving him. Eyes wide, one eyebrow cocked, funny smirk twisting his lips.

The violet eyed man laughed nervously, "Heh, telemarketers. Hate 'em."

"Obviously."

They exited the elevator, and walked to Heero's door. The blue-eyed man turned to look at his friend. "Is this where we kiss?" he asked.

Scratching the back of his head, Duo chuckled again, "Uh, if you want to."

Heero nodded, and waited for Duo to make the first move. Shifting on the balls of his feet, Duo bobbed his head. He had thought about this moment so much, but this was so far from what he had imagined. Leaning in, he gave Heero a quick peck on the lips.

"That's it?"

"You want more?"

"I was expecting something better than that."

"Well then, why don't you kiss me?"

"Fine."

Grabbing Duo by the neck, Heero pulled his face towards his own and mashed their mouths together, their noses collided as their foreheads bumped.

"Ouch," they said in unison, backing away from each other. Duo rubbed his forehead, and Heero clutched his nose.

"Sorry," the Japanese man mumbled, blushing brightly.

Matching blush for blush, Duo snickered, "It's okay."

An uncomfortable silence fell between them.

Taking in a breath, Duo came to the decision to try it one more time. "Come here."

Heero stepped up to him, an inch or two separating their faces. Placing one hand on the blue-eyed man's shoulder, Duo leaned in and placed a soft, lingering closed mouth kiss on his friends lips. Heero melted into the embrace, knees weakening.

Pulling away, Duo opened his violet eyes, smiling at how Heero's eyes fluttered open leisurely. Now that was the kind of kiss that had plagued his daydreams.

Heero smirked. He had never felt so heated from a simple touch.

"Good night," Duo whispered.

"Yeah, night. Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow. We'll figure out something to do then."

Heero watched as Duo walked back to the elevator before entering his apartment. In the elevator, Duo slid against the steel wall to the floor. Taking deep breaths, he attempted to still his rampant heart as he grinned to himself. _/That was so bizarre, but looks like we're doing it again tomorrow./_ His grin broadened.


	2. Chapter 2

Backwards

Chapter 2

Heero stood in his walk in closet, staring blankly at his clothes. Not wanting to make the same mistake two nights in a row, he tried to decide on what to wear for this evening. Obviously the tux was out. Though he didn't have a lot to choose from, five pairs of blue jeans, two pairs of black jeans, and slacks, a lot of green tank tops and other button up dress shirts. Was a button up shirt too nice? Should he just wear the same thing from the night before? They hadn't decided on what exactly they were going to do. Standing fully nude wasn't getting him anywhere. Opting for black jeans and an olive green oxford with short sleeves, Heero felt slightly at ease for choosing "normal" dress ware.

Pacing back and forth through the living room, Heero contemplated what he was doing. Maybe dating his best friend wasn't a good idea. Though he had been far from happy with Relena, he couldn't be sure he'd be happy with Duo. Or be able to make Duo happy for that matter. He sure as hell didn't make Relena happy.

But he did want to kiss the violet-eyed man again, that much he was aware of. Running the tip of his index finger gently over his bottom lip, a tingling feeling shot down his spine as he remembered the way his entire body heated up at that simple touch from the night before. Sure, the first two attempts had been…bad, but the third felt better than any kiss had shared before. Questioning his sexuality wasn't really part of this little experiment. He didn't consider himself straight or gay. Like most people, Heero didn't want to live alone, he wanted someone to spend time with and feel safe beside. Duo was definitely a better candidate in that regard. Relena was someone who need protection, and could never have his back like Duo. The braided man made him feel secure, another big reason why they were partners. If they took this any further they would have to relinquish their partnership for the Preventers. That might be okay. He could partner with Trowa or Wufei; they were capable and trustworthy enough, clearly.

A knock at his front door made him jolt, and then he practically bounced to the door excitedly. _/That was weird./_ Heero told himself, shook his head and shoulders to purge the strange reaction from his mind. Opening the door, Duo grinned at him.

"What? No flowers this time?" he teased.

"Oh, um, I didn't get flowers this time. We could stop by florist if you wan-"

"It was a joke."

"Oh, okay."

"So, what do you want to do tonight? We talked about dancing but you said you don't like clubs, so I don't know where to go."

"Fuck dancing, lets just get food again."

"Awesome, good. I wasn't really in the mood to dance. How's Italian sound?"

Duo insisted on taking his Harley again, and this time Heero was more comfortable with wrapping his arms around the braided mans' waist. Smirking, Duo purposefully gunned it out on the main road, making a sharp right turn, which inadvertently made Heero clutch him tighter and slide closer, pressing flush against his back. Biting his bottom lip, Duo groaned in the back of his throat at the sensation of the Japanese mans' groin forced against his ass.

At a red light, Heero scooted himself back, feeling inappropriately on the verge of being aroused. Speeding through a left turn, Duo got more than he bargained for when Heero again was forced backed up against him. The Japanese man had yet to grasp onto Duo for support when he made the sharp turn. His left arm wrapped tightly around his mid section as his right hand flew into Duo's crotch making contact with the mans sac, none too gently.

Coughing, Duo clutched the brake bringing the motorcycle to a halt. Luckily there was no one to rear-end them.

"I'm so sorry!" Heero yelped.

In a strained voice, Duo soothed, "It's okay, my fault. No worries."

A car honked behind them.

"Go around asshole!" Duo yelled, swinging his arm widely.

As the car passed, a man yelled back, "Get outta the road queers!"

"Fuck you asswad!"

"Does that happen a lot?" Heero asked.

"What? The name calling from ignorant bigots? Yeah, sometimes."

Adjusting his nuts, Duo started the bike back up again and drove more slowly; taking turns gently the rest of the way to the restaurant.

The outburst from the other driver placed Duo in a foul mood.

As they waited to be seated, Heero watched as Duo shifted from foot to foot, irritation radiating in his posture. Not really knowing what to do, Heero reached out and grasped Duo's elbow. Lifting his violet gaze to meet blue, Duo smirked sheepishly, annoyance fading. Confidence rising, Heero placed a soft feathery kiss to the braided mans' cheek. Duo blushed in response, grinning like a fool, and Heero flushed in return to his impulsive action.

"Did Relena really think you weren't sweet?"

Eyebrows furrowing, Heero appeared to be thinking really hard for a brief moment before stating, "I don't think I was. Not with her at least."

"Well, ain't I special?" the braided man snickered, and threw a wink in the Japanese man's direction.

Seated on the back patio, Heero and Duo ordered drinks, fine wine from the luxurious Italian restaurant. They ordered their food, sipping their beverages, and chit chatted about nonsense. The conversation came easier to Duo than Heero of course, but the blue-eyed man had no qualms about listening to the others fatuous clamor. He wasn't silent through the whole conversation though; he spoke up when he wanted to. Their food came, and they made it halfway through the meal without any incident. Halfway.

Being on an open patio meant being exposed to the elements, and springtime brought blossoming flowers, spring showers, and bugs. A loud buzz sounded in Duo's ear, which in return made the braided man jerk, his left hand flying to his ear to swat away the offending parasite. The jostle made his right hand twitch, which was holding a fork full of spaghetti, and said food went flying across the table and made contact with the center of Heero's chest. Glaring down at the mess of noodles and sauce on his shirt, Heero grunted. Duo gaped at his accident, before falling into an embarrassed panic.

"Shit! 'Ro I'm sorry," he apologized, standing from the table with the intention of helping his friend clean his shirt, but his hasty action only caused more trouble. Knee bumping the underside of the table sent Heero's wine glass falling into his lap. "Jesus Christ on a cracker!" Duo shouted as he rounded the table.

He kept apologizing as he dabbed Heero's shirt and pants with a water-damp napkin. The Japanese man stiffened and blushed from the weird looks they were getting from people seated around them. "Duo…Duo, Duo stop!" Heero harped, swatting his friends' hands away from his groin.

The blush on his cheeks deepened as he seated himself back across from Heero."I'm so embarrassed," Duo murmured, covering his eyes with his hand.

Heero chuckled, "Yeah, I can tell."

Peeking through his fingers, Duo smirked at the smile playing at the ends of Heero's lips. "Let's just get through dinner without further complications, yeah?"

"Okay," Duo laughed self-consciously.

The rest of the meal went along swimmingly, and Duo tried not to stare at the big red splatter stain on Heero's shirt.

Deciding on going to see a movie at the local theatre rather than call it any early night like their previous date, Heero and Duo bickered over which film to see. The options available to them were a romantic comedy, slasher horror flick, tear jerking drama, violent action packed suspense, a really old comedy they never heard of, or a sci-fi fantasy cartoon for kids.

"What's wrong with the action flick? It got decent-ish ratings," Duo complained.

Sighing, Heero revealed his reasons for disliking such movies. "They're always unrealistic. I mean, you should know, you handle guns. The bad guys shoot like fifty thousand bullets from handguns that hold, at the most, fifteen rounds. Plus, they miss their intended target even when they're firing a fully automated weapon. The explosions are horribly fake, and don't we deal with enough violence? Do we really have to watch more of it?"

"Fine, how 'bout the slasher? It's based on a classic! Can't go wrong with Friday the 13th, it's like the eighty-sixth one too!"

Heero just gave him a look that said, 'Really?'

"Fine, fine, but I'm not sitting through a romantic comedy, gag."

"How about the old comedy? It supposedly a classic."

"Sure let's go for that."

The two ex-gundam pilots got their tickets, large popcorn, and a large soda to share. Most of the seats were vacant in the theatre, so they picked their spot in the dead center. As the movie began to play, Duo groaned, "Aw, it's the sequel."

"What do you think a movie called Jackass is going to be about?" Heero asked in a hushed tone even though they were relatively alone in the theatre. Duo shrugged in response having never heard of the film or its sequels.

It became very clear early on that this movie was about a bunch of guys pulling pranks and doing dumb and often gross stunts. They laughed and groaned at the antics. Heero snorted soda through his nose, and Duo almost choked on popcorn. Both of them gagged at the more disgusting stunts, almost throwing up along with the people on the screen. They laughed so hard both of them had tears in their eyes, clutching their sides, and trying to gasp for breath.

"How have I gone through life not knowing about this movie?!" Duo boasted through his laughter. Heero was cracking up too hard to respond.

They left the theatre with their abs sore from laughter, and a giddiness that made them float in a dopamine high. On the ride back to Heero's apartment, Duo let the Japanese man drive his motorcycle, which gave him the opportunity to squeeze up on him. He became a little embarrassed when the vibrations of the bike and the ass pressed on his groin made him fairly hard in a matter of moments, but Heero didn't seem to notice or mind. _/Nawww…these maybe tight pants but he's noticed./_ Duo was not packing below average heat, which Heero did notice and felt his mouth go dry, but didn't discourage the contact.

Approaching Heero's door for the second time, the blue-eyed man inserted the key and pushed the door open. Duo thought the date was over without a goodnight kiss until Heero yanked on his wrist and stated bluntly, "You're coming inside."

"Is that a request or a demand?" Duo chuckled, allowing himself to be dragged through the threshold.

Shoving the braided man lightly, Heero sat beside him on his leather couch. Blues eyes stared into violet, waiting. After a moment of awkward gazing, Duo's eyes fluttered around the room, unsure of what to do or what was going on.

"How do we start this?" Heero asked.

"Start what?"

"Kissing, or what is commonly referred to as 'making out'. Who leads this in our situation?"

A gurgling sound echoed in the back of Duo's throat. Why did Heero have to go and make this whole thing so goddamn awkward? Though he did find it funny too. It was just so straightforward and so _Heero_.

"No one leads," the braided man explained. "It just happens."

"Okay, so let's make it happen," Heero stated and leaned into to Duo.

Rolling his violet eyes, Duo let Heero start the "make out session". All too soon, it became comfortable as their tongues slid against each other's. Duo found his hands roaming along the Japanese man's back, lightly massaging his shoulder blades. Heero kept his hands on the others hips, but he quickly felt more at ease and allowed his hands to fold behind the small of Duo's back. Inching downwards, the tips of his fingers traced over the hem of black jeans. Feeling more confident, still kissing, Heero pushed one hand against Duo's shoulder to make him lay down on the couch with himself on top.

Lost in a trance in the overwhelming joy of playing 'tongue of war' with Heero, the braided man fell compliantly to lay under his friend, his partner.

He still wasn't sure this was going to work out the way he wanted. Duo didn't even know if Heero was gay. This whole thing seemed to be happening on a whim, and he partially felt like a rebound. At that thought, Duo pulled away slightly, but Heero took that opportunity to trail his mouth down the braided man's jaw and neck. The blue-eyed man kept his lips latched on Duo's neck above the pulsing vein; he didn't sense the violet-eyed man's insecurities. Feeling bold, Heero traced his left hand back from Duo's shoulder, down to caress his ribcage, drag over his hip, and just before he could cup the other man through his pants, Duo tugged his hand away by the wrist.

Pulling his head back, Heero gazed down questioningly into hesitant violet. "What's wrong?" Heero asked.

"Um, nothing. Just a little fast, don'tcha think?" Duo settled for a half-truth rather than express his true doubts.

Heero shrugged. He didn't think they were going too fast, but then again, what the fuck did he know about dating? Lifting himself off the braided man, Heero sat waiting patiently for, what? He didn't know. The blue-eyed man quickly came to the conclusion that he should follow Duo's lead since his relationship with Relena had been a complete and utter failure, and he didn't want to make the same mistake twice. Though Heero was a solitary creature by nature, he just like another person wished to find companionship, affection, and possibly love. No body wants to be alone. No body wants to be the lone wolf forever. Who better to be with but someone who's fought along side you? Tended to your wounds. A person who has seen the best and worse facets of yourself. Heero may not be gay; he may not be straight, and bisexual even seemed too definite to label himself as. What's gender got to do with it anyways? Beauty is beauty. Caring and devotion go hand in hand. Love…? Love and sexuality was a tricky thing. Especially love. So many different kinds of love and though Heero wasn't sure if he was in love with Duo, he wanted and needed to find out. If it didn't work out, well he hoped the braided man's heart wouldn't be broken in the end and that their friendship would survive.

"What do you want to do?" he questioned.

This time it was Duo's turn to shrug. "I don't know." He didn't want to call it a night just yet, but he wasn't ready for Heero to fondle him. Thinking quickly, Duo added, "You said you liked to dance right?"

"Yeah."

"Well show me how you dance. I really only know how to club dance, ya know? Bump and grind," Duo admitted with a light blush, soft chuckle while scratching the back of his neck.

"Alright, I can teach you," Heero offered.

Jumping to his feet, Heero placed his MP3 player – a gift from Duo – on the simple sound system. Waving a hand at his friend, Heero motioned for Duo to stand and come close. Duo stood and slowly and made his way over to Heero, feeling unsure about his suggestion. _/Maybe we shoulda just kept makin' out./_ He thought to himself as Heero pressed the play button on the iPod.

The soft music vibrated off the white wash walls, low, slow, and easy. Heero raised his arms to place one on Duo's shoulder, the other on his hip. The braided man followed the lead and tried to match the dark haired man's slow steps. Heero had never danced with another man and didn't think much of it until their situation became tense.

"Ow," he mumbled when Duo stepped on his foot for the third time.

Again, the violet-eyed man excused, "Sorry." This was way out of his league and he was feeling more and more cumbersome with each passing step. Duo fuckin' sucked at dancing and he knew it.

"Just follow my lead," Heero tried to sooth.

Rolling his eyes, Duo argued, "I'm taller. Shouldn't I lead?"

"Maybe. If you knew how to dance in the first place."

As the music progressed into a violent crescendo, Duo again lost his footing and was far more lost than he would have cared for. "What the fuck are we dancing to anyways?" He asked irritably at the classic styled music.

"Tchaikovsky's Romeo and Juliet Fantasy Overture," Heero answered.

"Well that's our problem," Duo responded, releasing his grasp from Heero and turning off the music. "No one dances to this kind of music."

Heero defended, "I have."

"Yeah well, I'm not about to take you to a damn ball. So, can we change the pace?"

"To what? I was trained to dance this way."

"Dear, god. You poor wretched soul."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing! Nothing, but…let's start somewhere else. I know I said I can only bump and grind, but there's a simpler way of dancing that I know how to do," Duo confessed and placed his own MP3 player on the sound system. Before pressing play, he added, "You let me lead this time."

Rolling his blue eyes up to the ceiling, Heero stated, "I'm not a girl."

"Do I look like a girl to you?" Duo rebutted.

"Well you do have the hair –" Heero appraised the look of indignation on his friends face; eyebrow cocked, eyes ablaze in defiance, mouth screwed in an angry twist. "Never mind."

"That's what I thought."

Sure, his counterpart had the long flowing hair typical for females, but Duo was by no means a woman. Maybe he would have been confused at such from behind at fifteen, but now, with broad shoulders and a slender, narrow waist, mistaking him for a woman was virtually impossible unless the viewer was blind.

Pressing the play button, drums, piano and saxophone followed by the musical resonate of guitar and base filled Heero's small living room. Duo stood by the speaker for a brief moment as the song began and lyrics played out.

_/Got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack. I went out for a ride and I never went back…/_

Sauntering over to the blue-eyed man, Duo swayed his hips lightly and placed both hands on Heero's waist.

"Put your hands on my shoulders," he instructed.

Heero complied and swayed easily to the music. Latching his hands around the braided man's neck, the two swayed enjoyable, no longer stepping on each other's toes. Half way through the song, Heero was beginning to notice that he felt more comfortable dancing like this than following precise steps of a complicated waltz, tango, or whatever formal dance.

"This is how middle school kids dance," Duo admitted shyly, cheeks lightly painted pink.

"How would you know? You didn't go to middle school."

"No, but…I just know."

As the song came to an end and another began to play, the familiar tune made Duo pull Heero close, burying the shorter man's head into his shoulder, not wanting to peer into those frosty blue depths as the lyrics vibrated around them.

_/So cold, I know you can't believe it. Sometimes you've got to face the feeling. When you don't care if you get up again. There's a thousand things I will not understand…/_

Mouth pressed to Duo's shoulder, the messy haired man allowed his eyes to close and consume the words coming from the stereo system.

_/I hope you know I care…/_

Digging his fingertips into the braided man's shirt, grazing over the rope of hair itself, Heero felt a surge of warmth flood through him and the question of _/Am I doing the right thing?/_ flowed through his mind. If he broke Duo's heart could he really let the man push him away like he said he would? _/No,/_ was his quick answer. Clenching his eyes shut, nuzzling his nose into the crook of Duo's shoulder and neck, Heero knew he couldn't handle it if Duo distanced himself from him. He may not understand the concept of love, but he knew the need of keeping those few people who understood him _close_.

Pulling his head back slowly, the Japanese man had no intention of kissing Duo…until his eyes fluttered open. Seeing those apprehensive violet orbs, Heero was overcome with the sensation to ward off that doubtness. Crumble the dithering trepidation. Fight the skepticism.

Leaning forward slowly, Duo met him half way, and again their lips met. Closed, but sensual. Chaste, but heated.

His doubts lifting, Heero parted his lips, flicked his tongue against Duo's lower lip, and was rewarded with a low – almost silent – throaty groan before Duo's lips opened in agreement.

Their slow footfalls suspended, falling to a stop unconsciously as their tongues reached out to greet each other. Heero's hands clenched and massaged the back of Duo's neck as the other roamed his hands up and down the blue eyed man's shirt covered back.

Feeling hot and needy, Heero took Duo's right wrist in his hand and placed it up under his shirt, implying that he wanted the taller man to carass his chest.

Duo welcomingly obliged. Fingertips flowing over rippling muscles, brushing against a taut nipple before grabbing the whole peck and digging his nails into the flesh.

The unexpected harsh treatment made Heero unwillingly throw his head back and sound out a broken moan. Without missing a beat, Duo latched his hot mouth on the Japanese man's collar bone, suckling, nipping, and biting, until Heero stood strained on the balls of his feet, yearning and leaning in for more. His fingers tangled in chestnut locks, Heero lightly pushed down Duo's head, who eagerly bent at the waist to pull down the collar of Heero's shirt, opening the buttons, and feed on the blue eyed man's nipple.

Taking so much – too much – pleasure in having Heero bend and quake beneath his teasing erotic torture, Duo almost didn't fight the hand on his head pushing him down further.

Opening his violet eyes, Duo witnessed the visible tent in his friend's pants and pulled away.

"Too fast," he repeated.

Panting Heero asked, "You sure?"

"Yeah. I should go," he answered and took a step away, letting Heero's shirt to fall back and cover his chest.

"Okay," Heero responded grudgingly. "Tomorrow?"

"No one goes on a date on Sunday."

"We can."

Thinking it over briefly, Duo fought with himself and caved. "Okay," he whispered, head hung low in defeat.

"I'll pick you up early," Heero reassured. "Be ready for a day out."

And with that, Duo nodded his had and left, feeling aroused, confused, and despondent all at the same time.


	3. Chapter 3

Backwards: Chapter 3

After that sensual dance and heated standing make out session in his living room, Heero tried vainly to fall asleep in his bed. Two hours passed of tossing and turning before he shoved his hands down his box briefs and jerked himself off viciously. He hardly ever indulged in the selfish act of masturbation, but he couldn't get Duo out of his head. Those big strong hands, thick biceps, broad shoulders, all that fucking hair, and of course that nice muscled ass of a Greek God. Panting heavily after he came underneath the sheets, the Japanese man felt a sense of victory. If he could get off on the mentally visualized image of Duo, he could surely do it person. Maybe he was gay and this would all work out. Or even if he wasn't a homosexual, he definitely wanted Duo's touch and to touch him back. Smirking, he fell into a deep, happy sleep.

At eight a.m. on the dot, the Japanese mans inner clock went off like it always did, and he shot out of bed to get dressed and ready for the day. A moderate shower before he clothed himself in dark blue jeans that were cut off above the knee, green tank top – he kept buying the same tank he'd worn during the war because he _really_ liked that shade of green – and of course his yellow sneakers. Packing a backpack full of the necessary items for the day, he stuffed in four water bottles, six protein bars, a blanket, and two…blush worthy items that he'd purchased recently. Feeling confident, Heero hoped into his car and drove the short distance to Duo's apartment.

Nine twelve a.m. Heero knocked on the red door.

No one answered.

He knocked harder. Pressing his ear to the door, the blue-eyed man heard the stumbling frantic footfalls inside, and then…silence. Listening more intently, resting most of his body weight against the wooden entrance, the door suddenly flew open and he tumbled to the beige carpeted floor.

"What in the hell are you doin' here so damn early?" A grumpy, crusty eyed, loose hair Duo grouched.

Pushing himself up, Heero countered, "How did you go from walking so loud to not making any sound at all?"

"I'm not a stealth expert for nuthin'," the violet-eyed man chuckled. "But seriously, why are you waking me up at the ass crack of dawn?"

"It's nine seventeen," Heero corrected, looking down at his watch. "We have a date."

"This early?! What are we doing? Going to Denny's for a grand-slam?"

"No, not Denny's. We're going to this bagel place I like and then we are going hiking."

"Uuugghh," Duo groaned. "You're killing me here."

Eyes roaming over the floor, mouth twisted in a self-conscious frown, the Japanese man appeased, "We don't have to go if you don't want to."

Duo didn't like that bashful expression, so he conceded, "Naw, naw. We're going. Just lemme get dressed and shit. Not in that order."

Perplexed, Heero blinked rapidly, mouth opened and closed before he finally questioned, "Did you just tell me you need to _shit_?"

Duo, who'd already started walking back into his bedroom threw his head back and boisterously laughed, but didn't dignify that question with an answer.

A full thirty minutes later, Duo reemerged from his room dressed for a hike and hair braided neatly. Sluggishly, the violet-eyed man loaded his own black backpack full of water bottles and snack bars. They road together in Heero's car to "the bagel place" in silence. Duo was not accustomed to waking up early on his days off. He preferred to sleep until noon. So on the way to breakfast he nodded off a few times.

Something smacked the center of his chest, making him yell, "What?! What the fuck?!"

"We're here!" Heero belted and clasped Duo's wrist which had come flying towards his face.

The braided man grinned apologetically. "Sorry. Didn't mean to almost punch you in the face."

"It's okay," Heero chuckled. "You're obviously in dire need of caffeine."

"You can say that again."

"It's okay. You're obviously in dire need of caffeine," Heero repeated, straight-faced.

"I was joking."

"I know. I'm not _that_ socially retarded."

Snorting, Duo asked as he climbed out of the car, "When'd you get a sense of humor?"

Inside the bustling café they waited in line before ordering their food and coffee. Again Heero insisted to pay for their food and Duo was far too tired to argue, and part of him was appreciative for the blue-eyed man playing "gentleman" to him. They found a vacant table with three cushioned chairs, and they ate their breakfast wordlessly. Duo groaned happily while swallowing his first gulp of triple espresso coffee.

"Have you ever done anything different with your hair?" Heero curiously asked.

Embarrassing images fluttered through Duo's minds eye. That one time he'd spent the night at Hilde's place on L2, and in a drunken stupor they crimped his hair so the entire length had tiny little waves. That was awful. There was that time he'd found Sally's curling iron in her office and Duo had "borrowed" it. The curls came out soft, round, and silky…but all too feminine. Dorothy left her straightening iron in one of the many rooms in the Peacecraft mansion, and while he was on duty, but had nothing to actually _do_ , the braided man used it. Straight hair didn't look so bad, but he didn't like it as much as how it looked all wavy after unweaving it from its confined braid. On top of that, he'd done many experimentations in the privacy of his bathroom; two braids, ponytail, pigtails, sloppy bun, cornrows. Thinking of that last one made him shiver in disgust. Making a noncommittal squeak and rolling his shoulders, he hoped that not-answer would be enough. Heero shrugged, and Duo thanked his lucky stars. _/Cornrows…da fuq was I thinking?/_ Oh he almost forgot, there was the time he did Princess Liea buns, which looked ridiculous, girly, and above all else flat-out nerdy. Regardless, he wore the buns with a white turtleneck and watched Star Wars Episode Six: Return of the Jedi. Not the two remakes but the original 1983 film. The graphics were below par for the AC era, but how can you replace the friggin' original? He enjoyed the movie with the funny buns on the sides of his head whilst shoveling hand full after hand full of popcorn into his mouth.

"Heero? Duo?" A familiar voice called their names.

The Japanese man paused mid chew, and the braided man looked over his shoulder to find a smiling Relena Peacecraft.

"Hey Lena," Duo greeted awkwardly since Heero was frozen with his mouth half-open, partially mashed food visible.

Relena gave her former boyfriend a bashful smirk. "I'll purchase my breakfast and join you two."

Duo's violet eyes followed her form as the Vice Foreign Minster received her breakfast bagel right away before everyone else in line, her two bodyguards on either side of her.

"Please don't tell me this is where you two used to come for breakfast all the time!" Duo hissed at Heero.

Mumbling around the bread product in his mouth, Heero stated, "Yeah, but I didn't think she'd be here."

"'Ro!" Duo whispered angrily, "When you break up with someone, you gotta avoid all the old haunts you used to go to with that person!"

"How was I suppose to know that?!"

"It's common knowledge!"

"So sayth you!"

"So sayth _everyone_!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"What are you two arguing about?" Relena asked nicely as she sat in the available chair at their table.

"Nothing!" they both chimed in unison.

All three "friends" nibbled on their food quietly for a few uncomfortable moments. Heero avoided Relena's gaze by staring at his feet. Duo eyes flew all over the ceiling. The Vice Foreign Minister looked Heero up and down and waited for him to acknowledge her, which didn't seem would happen anytime soon.

"Heero," Relena called his name softly, and he reluctantly made eye contact with her. She forced a smile and continued, "Obviously there was something lacking in our relationship for you, but I believe the decision to break up was premature. I'd like to work on us."

A sinking feeling hit the pit of Duo's stomach. Heero and Relena had a lot of history, and it wouldn't just evaporate over night…let alone three days! His violet eyes fell to the checkered floor despondently, as he waited to hear Heero accept the offer to work their shit out.

The blue-eyed man saw the crestfallen expression on Duo's face and ended his mental argument. Sure, going back to Relena would be easy and comfortable, and maybe they could fix all the things that had gone wrong in their relationship, but he couldn't drop Duo like a hot potato like that. Besides, the prospect of returning to all those dinner parties, having the same fights over him not opening up, and the constant feeling of inadequacy didn't make Relena's offer all that appealing.

"I can't. I'm seeing someone," the Japanese man explained.

Dumbfounded, Relena parroted, "You're seeing someone? But we've only been broken up for three days!"

"Yeah and - "

"Who the heck are you dating already?!"

"It's D-"

"Dorothy! It's her, isn't it? She's always trying to one up me at every chance she gets! Why would you date her? What does she have that I don't? She's a vindictive shrew! Is that what you like? I can be mean like her if you want! I can - "

"It's not Dorothy!"

"Then who?!" Relena practically yelled, half a mind reminding her to remain calm so other people wouldn't notice. The last thing she needed was to be on the front page of the local paper for blowing up on her ex-boyfriend in a very public café.

"Duo."

"Duo, what?"

"I'm seeing Duo. We're actually on a date right now."

Cringing, the violet-eyed man lifted his gaze from the floor to Relena's shocked face. That horror-stricken expression twitched into a wide, open-mouthed mirthful laugh that clamorously fell from her face in a manic way.

After calming herself, Relena questioned, "No seriously, who are you seeing?"

"Duo," Heero stated firmly. To add proof to his blunt statement, the blue-eyed man gripped the braided rope of hair, tugged Duo's face unwillingly close to his, and – what was intended to be a quick kiss – sensually kissed his comrade with a soft pursing of his lips. Sparks of electricity ran down his spinal cord, jolting him to be gentler than he had planned to be. Shocked, all Duo could do was hold still, but a subconscious desire made him kiss back and his eyes roll back without closing all the way.

"That's a little far to go to prove your lie, Heero!" Relena exclaimed. "But if I'm perfectly honest, I've often thought of what you and Duo would look like kissing. That will fueling my fangirlish fantasies for a while." She stood up with her breakfast and turned to leave. "Think about us getting back together, okay Heero?" And then she left, two bodyguards in tow.

"I think she might be right. That was a bit much," the braided man sympathized vocally, but his eyes were wide with shock at the rest of the Vice Foreign Minister's admission.

"How else would I have gotten her to understand?"

"Persuade her with words. That _this_ is something you really want to explore. That being with her didn't make you happy, and I mean that you should tell her that in the nicest way possible. And that you being with me is maybe something that you really want," Duo explained. "That would have saved me from knowing that she's going to be thinking about us at night…ew."

Blushing, Heero admitted, "I didn't think of that. I just assumed if she saw me kiss you than she'd realize that I don't want to be with her."

"Well, she sure as shit didn't get that message," Duo gruffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Are you even sure that this," he waved his hand between himself and the Japanese man, "is what you want?"

"Yes," Heero answered swiftly. Fumbling around with his coffee cup, he tried to find the right words to express himself. "I want this. I want to keep trying. I feel safe and comfortable around you. I don't have to force anything. I don't think you understand how good that feels."

"I do," the violet-eyed man consoled. "I'm much more than the 'funny' guy I make myself out to be. I…I have my own issues and demons. I just handle them differently than you and the other guys do."

"You pray when you're scared," Heero pointed out. Duo's eyes widened at the acknowledgment. He only ever prayed when he thought things – a mission – was about to turn to shit, and he didn't steeple his hands under his chin, but rather clutched his gold cross necklace and whispered into it. Heero added, "You listen to a lot of sad, ambient music. You take two days off work whenever you or I, Trowa or Wufei and on the off chance, Quatre, have a near death experience. You hide in your office with the door locked when you don't want to talk to anyone. When you've had a bad day, you take out your aggression on the punching bag at the Preventer's gym until your soaked in sweat and your arms shake. You make people around you laugh so no one will ask how you are because if they do, you can't – won't – lie. You smile all the time, but it doesn't always reach your eyes. You're often sad, and I may not be the best person to seek comfort from, but I want to be there for you like you've been there for me when I'm down. That's what friends, and more than friends, do for each other, right?"

Heero's lengthy, unknowing heartfelt speech came to an end, and Duo hid his eyes behind his hand. The idea that Heero saw so much of him had never crossed his mind. Tears formed at the bottom lids, blurring his vision, but he refused to let them fall. This was the side of the blue-eyed man that people didn't see, the ever observant, caring person who simply didn't know how to respond to emotional vulnerability. It wasn't that he was cold and callous by choice; Heero just wasn't wired to confront or comfort poignant feelings.

"Am I really that transparent?" Duo asked, hand still blocking his vision.

The Japanese man thought hard about that question. No else ever seemed to think of Duo as the sad person he saw. "No. I see it because I watch you."

"Why do you watch me?"

"Because I care. Because I want you to come to me, even though I probably wouldn't be any good at giving you solace."

"I want to be the same for you."

"You already are," Heero confessed.

"Oh really? How?" Duo always sought out Heero's attention, and there were times when the two of them sat silently in the same room together. The braided man knew when his friend needed company minus any and all conversation; it was one of the many idiosyncrasies about Heero that Duo simply attributed to his stoic friend wihtout question.

Mulling over past accounts and circumstances, Heero answered, "You're there when I _do_ want to talk, which isn't often. You're the person I trust most to back me up. You're my best friend, and I probably have a convoluted understanding of that term, but I've come to see that you understand me more than anyone else we know. Sometimes you just sit in my office quietly when at first I don't think I want company, but your presence makes me feel better. Nobody else can sit in the same room as me and not talk, except Trowa. But he doesn't give me the comfort that you do. Which doesn't make sense to me, but that's just how it is. You never ask me about my upbringing, and though I would be more at ease talking to you about it, Relena never let the subject drop…If I want to talk about it, I'll talk about it."

Removing his limb from his eyes, Duo responded truthfully, "If you want to talk about it, I would like to hear it. I could tell you about my childhood too."

"No," Heero answered firmly. "If I ever feel the need to speak about it I'll go to a therapist first, and then maybe you, but as of right now…I don't wish to reflect on it. If you still have the desire to tell me more about you're childhood then I'm all ears."

"I don't really feel like talking about it yet either."

Finishing up their breakfast, they took their remaining cups of lukewarm coffee to Heero's truck. The drive was relatively silent in a tranquil manner; the braided man downed the rest of his beverage while staring out the window at the passing scenery. Heero shifted nervously in the driver's seat. His mind kept turning back to the thing he'd done last night, and the items he'd packed. There was something he need – and indeed wanted – to do, but going about it was going to be awkward for sure. Usually Duo's incessant talking would keep him distracted from inner dialogue, but he didn't want to break the comfortable silence. Without looking, the blue-eyed man turned on his MP3 player that was plugged into the AUX unit in his car. The song started right off the bat with soft lyrics and a low bass line. _/I brought you something close to me…/_ (1). Mindlessly rolling his head with the tune, the trance-like melody pushed the braided further into a more relaxed and happy state of mind.

Turning off the paved road, Duo read a small sign that read "Holy Jim Canyon". The terrain became uneven and bumpy after a mile, and the Japanese man took the narrow road slowly.

"How'd you find this place?" Duo asked, gazing intently at the beautiful green foliage. It was so delightful and far away from the concrete jungle (i.e. _the city_ ) that it brought great excitement to the violet-eyed man. A chance to get away from it all. A chance to find peace amongst nature. Sometimes it surprised him how he found Earth so beautiful; you could never find a secluded woodsy area on L2 or any other colony.

Heero answered, "I hike low pedestrian trails on my free time. This is one my favorites and one of the most lovely. There's a small waterfall two miles in."

"A waterfall?! Really? That's fuckin' awesome!"

"Yeah, there's a better waterfall in Black Star, but that is a longer hike on an unmapped trail."

"Don't think I coulda handle it, eh?"

"No, I rather show you this one first because this waterfall isn't as impressive as Black Star's. Didn't want to diminish the beauty of this one by showing you Black Star's first."

"…You're weird."

"So I've been told."

"It's cool. I like weird."

"So you like me?"

"Didn't you figure that out in the locker room, which led to all these weird-ass dates."

"Yes…do you mean weird as in bad?"

"Didn't I just say I like weird?"

"Most people would categorize bizarre as an undesirable feature."

"I'm not 'most people', and neither are you."

"Good point," Heero affirmed and parked the car.

Both slung their backpacks over their shoulders and started down the beaten path. Over the course, they chatted idly and enjoyed each other's company. Forty-five minutes later they made it to the falls. It wasn't a gushing river over the edge of a towering embankment, but a simple heavy stream running down a rocky façade. Nonetheless, it was still beautiful with moss growing up the jagged edges of dark rock, plant life veining towards the water, up to the sun.

"This is so amazing," Duo whispered.

Eyeing his comrade, Heero agreed, "Yeah, it is."

The braided man noticed that Heero wasn't looking at the fall but at himself. Smirking dubiously he asked, "How amazing is it?"

His blue eyes didn't register his stalker like gaze had been perceived. "Breathtaking."

Blushing, the violet-eyed man shyly churned his jaw and grinned reluctantly. "I agree," he responded, eyes still fixed on the scenery. "You're pretty breathtaking yourself."

This time Heero flushed, cleared his throat, and marched further down the trail. Duo followed, chuckling under his breath. They hiked for another hour before finding a clearing. A large hill to the left the trail covered in soft, lush green grass. They agreed to take a break and munch on their snacks. Heero wandered off to take a leak in privacy. While unattended, Duo rifled through the Japanese mans pack for better treats, and what he found made his eyes bug comically out of his head. In his hands was a blue wool plaid blanket, a tube of lube, and baby wipes.

Walking back to his comrade, Heero saw that Duo grasped in his hands those two blush worthy items.

"I, uh, uh, I-I, uuuhhhh," the blue-eyed man stammered as his face turned beat red.

"I take it you were planning on some kind of sexual interaction to happen, ya?"

Heero nodded.

"Didn't I say this kind of thing might be too fast for us?"

Heero nodded again.

"So why did you bother to bring these things?"

"Because I want to try…and because I'm ready to."

Well…that was unexpected. "You're…you're ready?" Duo parroted.

Again, Heero replied with a nod of his tousled head.

Staring at the items in his hand, Duo quirked, "I get the blanket and the lube, but why the wipes?"

"My…extensive research illuminated to me that it could get me-messy if the proper precautions aren't taken care of."

"What precautions did you take?"

Pinching the bridge of his nose, that blush refused to subside and he couldn't muster up the emotional distance to vanquish it. "I, um, did a _cleansing_ and shaved this morning."

"You mean you did an enema, and you shaved."

"Uh huh."

"Like front to back? You shaved it all?"

"Yes."

"That's thoughtful of you. It makes doing certain things more enjoyable to do," Duo appeased.

"Yeah? Like what?"

"Well, if I want to rim you, I'd rather there be no body hair in the way."

"Rim," Heero mimicked. "The act of performing oral sex on outer and inner sanctions of the anus."

"Yes, that is the textbook definition of it."

"That's something you want to do?" Heero asked, face twisting into a cringe.

"I do like doing it," Duo admitted. "But we don't have to do that today."

"Can we do something today?"

"Sure, uh, I guess. Errr, what do you want to experience? And don't say sex. No one is getting penetrated today. I'll do somethings, but that is not on the docket. We're sticking with the going slow thing."

"Not even fingers?"

"Maybe we can do that, but no penis is going inside anyone's…anus," Duo reiterated lightly and decided to use decent language than foul wording.

"You mean rectum."

"Yeah, sure, whatever. It's not going to happen."

"Alright," Heero conceded, and unceremoniously began to strip.

"W-wha-what are you doing?"

"Removing my clothing so we can, literally, get down to business," Heero threw out nonchalantly and pushed his jeans down.

"We're doing this here?!" the braided man squeaked. Heero nodded and removed his grey boxer briefs. "You're uncut," Duo observed in that high-pitched peep.

Toeing off his socks, the Japanese man questioned, "Is my un-circumcision an issue?"

"No, no. I hear the foreskin adds more sensitivity and pleasure."

"My research agrees with your statement, but I can't vouch for it."

Heero took the blanket from Duo's grasp, and the braided man had to turn his head sharply as the blue-eyed man's bare groin got too close to his face. "Oh dear god," the violet-eyed man chirped, blushed, and felt his half hard erection pulse to full arousal. This was _so_ different from what he had imagined, and the squeakiness of his voice couldn't be fought off.

Heero laid on his back on the blanket, arms pressed tightly to his sides, legs bent at the knee and spread wide. Duo gazed at him in disbelief; his comrade was going about this in all the wrong ways. He wasn't even physically aroused!

"What are you doing?" Duo groaned, and covered his face with both hands.

"Waiting for you to start."

"This is not how we should do this."

"What do you mean?"

"Is this how you and Relena got intimate?"

"We never got further than brief make out sessions and simple groping."

"Oh…" For some reason that brought a smile to Duo's face. Still fully clothed, Duo climbed between Heero's parted legs and hovered over him.

"What are you doing?" Heero asked.

Duo implored, "You really want to do this?"

"Yes."

"Then you should know you're too tense, and we can get to this point in a less straight forward manner."

"Okay…I'm starting to feel a little embarrassed, so can we stop talking and just do whatever."

Duo pushed himself back and stripped off his own shirt. He flopped back down to linger above Heero again. A wicked smile spread across his face, and he taunted, "You sure you want to do - "

"Oh, just fucking kiss me alre-murrffphhzzz!"

The braided man laughed against Heero's scowling lips. Off to a strange start, the kiss eased something sensual and easy. Duo rested his full weight on top of Heero, which allowed the Japanese man to run his blunt nails up Duo's back and bury his fingers under the base of the violet-eyed mans braid. Bracing his arms under Heero's shoulders, he cradled that dark head of hair, rolled his thumbs over the Japanese man's ears, and inhaled the throaty groan that escaped the man beneath him. Raising his hips to grind against the pelvic bone above him, Heero didn't find the cargo pant's texture all that friendly. Shoving his hands between them, the blue-eyed man – who's tongue was in the midst of an either-side-wins battle, wins – shoved his hands between their two bodies and undid, pushed down, and groped at the taut bulge under cotton boxers. This was one of the tests they had to conquer. Heero was elated to find himself even more titillated at having another man's sex in his hand. Duo was fearful that Heero would pull back, push him away and freak out, but Heero grew noticeably more daring and needy.

Both bodies flared ten degrees as the make out session progressed into unknown territory. Preconceived notions were lost, self-consciousness abandoned, the natural heady flow of desire took the forerunner. Their legs intertwined, wrapping around each other for anchor. Heero's back lifted from the blanket, arched instinctively into the body above him, grazing their bare chests together in heated needy comfort. Duo obliged by sinking his weight further downward, pressing and rubbing against Heero's body in appreciation. The flesh-to-flesh contact raised both of their bodily temperatures even more, heightening them to an unbearable peak. Aroused, and in desiring for further bare body exposure, Heero pushed down Duo's red boxers with his feet. Duo lifted his hips in attempt to appease the needs of the man beneath him, but the second their bare groins made contact, he gasped, coughed, and wheezed. Overwhelmed with the sensation of his wet dreams grinding against him in reality, Duo lost all inhibitions. Kneading in the back of his throat wantonly, Duo ground his hips along Heero's, and found a way for sexual gratification that they both sought without penetration.

He lulled, rolled, and wiggled his hips to add more and less friction between Heero's member and his in the sake of Frottage (2). The violet-eyed man wasn't displeased when Heero responded naturally; bucking his hips, clawing at his arms, whining for more without putting his needs into words.

Rolling over, pulling Heero on top, the braided man thrusted upwards harshly, their engorged organs collided roughly, and Duo's cock slipped between Heero's legs, and brushed past his testicles and against his taint (3).

Breathlessly, the dry humped against each other. It was more than the satisfaction they were looking for. Jumping into sex would only add complications to this knew…whatever it was. The rubbing, gliding, and dry humping techniques brought them both close to the edge of orgasmic bliss. Heero whined loudly in the back of this mouth, tore his lips away from Duo's, and sunk his teeth into soft white pale neck-skin with a little more aggression than he intended, but the violet-eyed man respond favorably. On top, Heero was free to buck, roam, and ride to his desire. With their hard cocks making intimate, soft and rough contact, Duo too was creating sounds of whimpering pleasure. The tip of his cock pressed hard against the blue-eyed man's taint again, and Heero gasped sharply, enthralled with the attention.

Clenching both shoulders in his fearful strong grasp, Duo asked in all serious manner, for he felt too close to tumbling head first over the edge, "Th-th-is is wh-what you wan-ant, yeah?" But he couldn't cease his hips from thrusting upwards if he wanted to.

Heero squirmed frantically above him. The ever-increasing body temperature, twitching limbs, and the new experience of engaging someone in this kind of sexual endeavor kept him from answering verbally. Panting thickly against each other's mouths, Heero couldn't take the growing tension between his legs, so he reached between, gripped his and Duo's cocks in one hand, and stroked. Hard. The added tonic of his fist tossed Heero over the edge into oblivion, as if he were a lost space particle being sucked into a black hole. He came, and came hard. Resting his head on Duo's shoulder, a strangled sob of sorts wrenched its way up from the pit of stomach. All the violet-eyed man could do was grip at Heero's protruding shoulder blades as he felt that hot bodily fluid pulsate and spread across his stomach. Duo honestly thought Heero would cease and not worry about him finding release, but he was more than pleasantly surprised when the dark-haired man kept pumping his hand over his dick, even changing the technique. Post orgasmic rush heightened when Heero felt the violet-eyed man tense, squeak helplessly, and reach his own end. Heero watched enthralled as Duo came, adding more white milky substance to his stomach and lower chest. Unconsciously, he was about to do something very bold, his mouth-watering and wanting to taste their combined pleasure, but Duo hauled him forward, kissed him roughly, and their essences was spread between them like jam and peanut butter between two slices of moist bread. Embraced tightly, their over sensitizied tongues danced for a dominance that didn't matter.

The emotions raging between them were strong and terrifying. This, this is what Duo had always fantasized about, but the fantasy could never live up to or exceed the reality. Would he be let down in the long run? Heartbroken at the end? Or worse, would he be the one to end it all? Did the questions even matter? Wasn't life about living in the moment and riding the crashing waves and let it land wherever it may?

Heero's feelings were a different kind of battlefield. This was the most intense, honest, intimate, easy-going thing that he'd ever experienced. Did this mean he was gay? _/Fuck that, it doesn't even matter now./_ And it didn't, that wasn't the query that would keep him up at night. How would he react if Duo cut it off? Refused to be his partner on assignments? Wasn't there when he needed him to be. The deprived Japanese man was by far from understanding the concepts of ambiguous emotion dubbed "Love", but he was learning quickly. This was far from the strained, forced encounters between him and Relena.

Love. Love was that thing that romantic comedies dictated came easily, unforced, and overall natural. No sentiment of wrongness, depending on the era one lived in…and his was far from most hurtful prejudices. At this point, all Heero knew was that he'd be hurt if Duo pulled away, ran away and hid in the shadows. That just wasn't something he could take.

The two internally quarreling men laid on the blanket, entwined for a long time. Gathering their breaths and the extreme euphoria battled with their insecurities, but the moment was cut short for violet eyes spied an intruder.

"Don't do anything," Duo whispered in Heero's ear.

Not sure what that statement meant, Heero nodded and hummed in agreement. A moment later he pushed softly from the braided mans chest, the absence of bodily comfort was colder than he would have anticipated and unwelcomed.

Duo sat up and Heero was sure he was going to dress quickly and attempt to pretend that what had just taken place hadn't happened.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKIN' AT?" Duo bellowed. Heero sat up offended, determined to scream back, but he saw who Duo was yelling at and fell back to hide on the blanket for all that was worth. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!" Duo yelled at the pudgy man standing in the middle of the trail with his football sized Chihuahua on an orange leash. The man turned and walked back down the path, completely unfazed. Duo was on the verge of boiling over at the intimate moment coming to an abrupt, harsh end, but he kept his volatile temper under control. They were outside in the open of course; he couldn't blame someone for stumbling across them.

"Sorry," Heero mumbled apologetically into the blanket.

"Sorry?" Duo questioned. "Why the hell are you sorry?"

"We shouldn't have done this outside."

Duo laughed, anger subsiding. "Don't worry about it. That comes with the territory of being exhibitionists. Gotta say, I'm surprised you were down for such a display where prying eyes could see."

Thunder roared above them, and their eyes shot up to the see dark billowing clouds.

"You didn't happen to check the forecast today, did you?"

"…No."

The heated air they'd created made them oblivious to the dropping temperatures in the air. And then, the Gods opened the clouds and a down pour fell. Scrambling frantically, the two men through their clothes back on, packed their stuff back into their backpacks, and ran down the trail. Along their four-mile sprint, they passed the obese man – who was smart enough to bring an umbrella – and his shivering pint-sized rat dog. By and by, they reached Heero's car in a little over forty minutes completely out of breath, mud caked to their calves, and drenched to the bone. Hopping into the car Duo apologized for getting mud all over the floor and soaking the seat.

"Don't worry about," Heero assured, and removed his sopping tank. Turning the key in the ignition, the Japanese man blasted the heater. Turning to look at the violet-eyed man, Heero asked, "What do you want to do now?"

"Get some dry clothes at my place and eat some lunch. You can borrow some of my shit."

"Hn."

So, they did just that. Duo changed into black jeans and a long-sleeved black shirt. He tossed red sweat pants and grey shirt at Heero.

"Wow, you own clothing that aren't black," the blue-eyed man teased.

"Hardy-har," Duo mocked. "I just don't were 'em often cuz black is my favorite color, duh."

"Black isn't a color. It's a shade," Heero corrected.

"Then it looks like I don't have a favorite color."

"My favorite color is green."

"Really? You don't say. Woulda never have guess since you wear green almost everyday," jested Duo as he unraveled his wet braid and shook it out.

Suddenly flustered, Heero realized how amazing Duo looked with his hair down and stringy with dampness. The confusion came from never having noticed it before because he had certainly seen Duo freshly showered in the gym locker room on several occasions, so why was this time so different? Was this the power physical intimacy held? Was what they had done illuminating the violet-eyed man in a bright new shining light, hyper focusing on every attractive feature and amplifying them into pristine clarity? If sex had that kind of effect maybe he should have done it with Relena… _/No, that would have just made it harder to break up with her./_ Heero could feel his vision of the braided man changing rather quickly over the past three days. He was no longer Duo, but _Duo_. Maybe the attraction had always been there and he'd just been too blind and ignorant to acknowledge it, but now the veil had been lifted, and everything was going to change between them…everything was already changing, reshaping their dynamic, and though it was somewhat nerve-racking it was far out weighed by the excitement.

Coming back down to earth, the Japanese man realized his face was two inches away from Duo's who was looking at him with a bemused expression. Placing one finger under Heero's jaw, the America pushed up and closed Heero's mouth. "You'll catch flies if you keep your mouth open like that," he laughed, causing the blue-eyed man to blush and clear his throat nervously. "Come on, let go eat. We'll take my car."

"You have a car?"

"Of cour- OH MY GOD!" He shrieked.

"What? What?"

"I'VE NEVER SHOWN YOU MY BABY PANTHER!" Perplexed, Heero simply stared at Duo. "I call her my Baby P! She's awesome! Come on!" He yanked and Heero's arm and hauled him the garage. Flipping on the lights, Duo released Heero's bicep and wave his arms wildly through the air. "TA DAAAAA!"

Heero glared at the black car. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to be impressed, cars weren't really his thing. "Cool?" he squeaked.

"Cool? COOL?! This baby is motherfuckin' top shit right here, buddy! I call her Baby P because she's a Pantera. A nineteen ninety-one, heavy body, five hundred horse power, stunning piece of art!"

 _/Nineteen ninety-what?!/_ "Goddamn, that's old!" Heero blurted, but his outburst was an understatement. A car from the twentieth century in the AC era was simply unheard of unless it was on display in some museum. "Where the fuck did you get this thing?"

"I used some of my war funds to by my dream car, but first I had to figure out which car that was and when I did, I spared no expense. Got Baby P from a classic car collector in Las Vegas, Nevada, and now she's mine. All mine," Duo ended his little gushing speech on a whimsical note. "Come on, hop in! Let's get some grub!"

They got into the classic sports car and Duo ignited his "baby" to life.

"It sure is louder than cars these days," Heero noted over the roaring engine.

Boasting, Duo added, "I know! Isn't it great?!"

'Great' might not be the word Heero would have chosen, but seeing Duo so overwhelmed with giddiness made him agree with a nod of his head. Flooring it in reverse, they lurched out of the garage and sped down the road. The Japanese man hung on to the car for dear life. Of course Duo was speed demon, and Heero mentally slapped himself in the face for thinking the braided devil wouldn't drive like he was on a race track, barreling towards red lights and taking each turn sharply causing the wheels to _screeeeecch_ along the wet asphalt. He prayed they wouldn't hydroplane.

Lost in a state of euphoria, Duo sang loudly with the song that blared through the speakers, "You can do me up like Woodrow Wilson, carry my children…" (4) Utterly ignoring Heero's state of fear.

Eventually, they parked outside of local burger joint, and Heero exited the car on shaky legs. The sky still poured buckets of water, so they had to run in quickly before getting drenched again. It was warm and cozy in the diner, and just as they were about to be seated by the hostess they heard, "DUO! HEERO! OVER HERE!"

Turning, they saw their blond comrade waving his arm through the air, smiling widely. Next to Quatre sat his boyfriend, their other friend, Trowa. Duo groaned knowing they'd have to go sit with them. He just wanted this date to go uninterrupted - though it felt more like hanging out with sex-curricular activities – but God was not on his side today.

Sitting down across from their two lovebird friends, the first thing that popped out of Quatre's face was, "What are you guys doing today?"

Without thinking, Heero proclaimed, "We're on a da-" _SMACK!_ Duo's hand covered his mouth and prevented him from speaking.

"We're just hanging out. Ya know, doing stuff. Together. Like normal people do," jabbered Duo.

Both Trowa and Quatre ogled their un-braided friend as if he'd sprouted a second head.

"Stuff…like what?" Trowa asked.

Duo removed his hand from Heero's face who was giving him a vicious Death Glare and rambled, "Hikin'. We went on a hike. Got some fresh air. Smelled the flowers. It was cool. 'Ro showed me a waterfall."

"You went hiking in this weather?" Quatre wondered.

Heero opened his mouth to speak but Duo cut him off. "Yup, yup. Wasn't rainin' cats and dogs when we left this mornin', and we didn't check the forecast so we kinda got caught up in it, but yeah. It was fun while it lasted."

Irritated would be labeling Heero's current mood mildly. Obviously Duo didn't want their friends to know they were on a _date_ , and the reasons behind that were lost on him. So he fell into his usual rigid composure, kept his mouth shut, and allowed the people around him to converse without his input. They ordered and ate their food, talked about the mundane, and Heero only spoke when directly spoken to…which Duo avoided, evidently.

Heero excused himself to use the restroom, and was relieved to find it empty. He needed some empty space to think. Splashing water on his face, he took a few deep breaths, and then the door opened and Quatre walked in, killing the solitary heaven with his mere presence.

Crossing his arms over his chest and leaning one hip against the first skin in a row of four, Quatre ventured, "You going to tell me what's going on?"

Playing dumb, Heero shrugged, "What do you mean?"

"I'm getting mixed emotions from the both of you, and don't try to tell me some bull crap story. This," he pointed at his heart, "knows all, so you may as well come clean."

"Just what are you picking up from me with your damned space heart?" Heero demanded, unwilling to simply open up.

Rolling his sky blue eyes, the blond man asked, "I don't really need to tell you what you're feeling, do I?"

"Wha…what's Duo feeling?" Heero asked curiously as he glared at his reflection.

"He's, well, it's weird, but he's extremely happy and scared at the same time." That eased some of his frustration. "I've never seen him in public with his hair down. He's obviously at ease and guarded at the same time. Care to shed some light on what's going on between you two?"

"It's just…stuff."

Quatre's eyes bugged out of his head. "You mean like romantic stuff?!" Heero was going to deny, but the blond went on, "Don't lie! I can feel it! I can feel your sentiment for him! Oh my god! Are you two hooking up or something?" He didn't need an answer for his invasive Space Heart knew. "Holy crow! You are! I knew this would happen at some point! No one else thought Duo had a chance in hell with you, but I did! Are you dating? Oh no, what happened to Relena? You're not cheating on her are you?! Heero Yuy, if you two-time anyone I'll kick your ass! I swea-"

"Fucking Christ Quatre, shut up! Yes, we are on a date. No I'm not 'two timing' anyone. I broke up with Relena on Friday, and now I'm figuring stuff out with Duo. Jesus, you're just as bad as he is. Fuck!"

"Sorry," Quatre laughed a half assed apology. "Well I'm glad you two are doing this."

"Yeah well, he doesn't seem to want anyone to know about it, so keep your mouth shut."

"Aww," Quatre drawled. "That bothers you. I could tell you why, but I think you should communicate with him."

Heero begged, "No, please. Just tell me."

"Hmm, no." And with that, Quatre bounced out of the restroom leaving the Japanese man irked for a whole new reason.

While they were in the bathroom, Trowa stared down Duo with a heavy blank gaze.

"Whaaat?" Duo hissed, glaring daggers at his friend and fiddling with his loose hair. "Don't like my hair down or somethin'? Too bad, it doesn't dry when it's all braided up and drenched. Did you enjoy your lunch? I really like my cheesebur-"

"Stop it."

"Stop, what?"

"Stop your nervous babbling and tell me what's going on," Trowa demanded.

"I haven't the slightest idea of what you're talkin' 'bout."

Trowa glared. "Don't play dumb, Maxwell. You only chatter a mile a minute when you're nervous about something, and Heero was scowling at his food like it might dare jump up and eat him. Besides, he seemed in good spirits when you two sat down, but then you stopped him from talking and he got all tense and cold."

"He did?" Duo asked, solemnly.

"Yes, he did. So what gives?"

Crossing his arms defensively, Duo grunted, "None of your business."

The green-eyed man was shocked by his friends' standoffishness, and was about to argue when Quatre came back to the table followed shortly by Heero. They paid their bills and bade each other farewell at the door.

Back in the Pantera, the braided man shifted to look at Heero and questioned, "Are you upset about something?"Shrugging his shoulders, Heero kept his gaze fixated on the passengers' window. Exhaling a large sigh, Duo continued, "You know, we're gonna have to talk for this to wor-"

"Okay fine," Heero interrupted. "I'll talk. Why didn't you want them to know we're dating?" Surprised by the angry tone, Duo said nothing. "Are you embarrassed or something? Ashamed?"

"No! God, no!" he retorted. "It's just that this," we gestured his hands between the two of them, "is still in like, you know, beta testing. I don't want everyone sticking their nose in this yet since we don't even know what the hell is gonna happen. I just feel like if everyone knew, they'd be taking bets on whether we work out or not, that's all."

"…I guess I can understand that."

"So can we keep this a secret for now?"

"Yeah," Heero agreed, purposefully omitting the fact that Quatre figured it out on his own with that nosy Space Heart of his.

Leaning forward, Duo cupped the back of Heero's head, running his fingers through silky dark brown locks, and kissed him sweetly.

Since it was only mid afternoon, they decided to go back to Duo's apartment to hangout. It appeared the rain was not going to let up anytime soon, so they settled for watching movies. Duo's television was located in his bedroom, so clearly, that's where they ended up.

"Is your bed big enough?" Heero asked sarcastically, eyeing the unmade queen sized bed.

The violet-eyed man laughed. "Hey, sleep is a luxury, and I want the best. Sit. It's a pillow top so it's super comfy."

 _Un_ comfortable, Heero sat at the edge and nodded. He'd never been in Duo's bedroom before, and when he dated Relena he'd only gone through her room to either find her or sweep it for bugs, something job related. Part of him felt like he shouldn't be in the room, and that it was a more intimate atmosphere than fooling around out in the open. He reminded himself that Duo was adamant about taking things slow, so why was he getting so worked up? It was an odd combination of things. He was already wearing Duo's clothes, and now sitting on his plush bed, poor Heero could feel the awkwardness creeping up on him like spiders crawling up his back.

"Chillax, 'Ro. Pick a movie," Duo said with the nod of his head at the collection of DVD's on the dresser by the large high definition TV. Reading the titles, Heero noticed the braided man was a big horror movie fanatic, but he wasn't in the mood for blood and guts. After living such a violent life watching violent movies didn't seem so appealing. One title stood out, a bizarre sounding title and he picked it from the pile to view the cover. Some kind of cartoon, a claymation film from the looks of it.

"Is this any good?" Heero asked, intrigued.

"The Nightmare Before Christmas? Hell yeah it's good. One of the best clay animated movies ever."

"Okay, let's watch it."

"Really? Doesn't seem like the kinda flick you'd pick, but okay."

"What kind of movie do you think I'd choose?"

"I dunno, a documentary or something."

"Do you have any?"

"Um, no."

Heero chuckled, "Didn't think so."

Popping the movie in, Heero sat stiffly at the end of the bed again, while Duo got comfy against the headboard and pillows. "You can sit back here, ya know."

Peering over his shoulder, he could see Duo was almost done rebraiding his hair. "Why are you putting your hair back?" He asked.

"Cuz it's dry now."

"I like it down."

Smirking, Duo shook his head back and forth, letting the long chestnut locks to unravel. "Alright. I'll leave it down, but you gotta come sit back here by me." He patted the mattress next to him with a big cheeky grin.

Scooting back, Heero nestled himself amongst the pillows – that of which there were approximately seven on the queen sized bed – brought his knees and attempted to find comfort. Duo was also feeling unsure and tense. Of course the bed and all the plush pillows weren't to blame for restless atmosphere but the desire to be closer, and neither one wanting to close the gap. Just because they'd taken one step into sexual territory didn't mean everything was going to flow smoothly and all uncertainties would evaporate. If anything it compounded them. Duo was still having a hard time believing all this was happening. It was like a dream, and their mutual touching already felt like it happened eons ago. Heero was warring with the unfamiliar need to cuddle, and he hated that term. He was not the tactile person that Duo was, and he was telepathically begging the American to close the distance. But neither of them moved for the first half of the movie. As subtly as possible, Duo leaned towards Heero, slumping to the left and extending his long legs. There was still a good six inches between them, and he hoped he came off as simply readjusting his position to give the appearance of _relaxed._ Undoubtedly, Heero missed the hint and remained were he was.

Annoyed with the tension, Duo blurted, "Are you okay with what happened early?"

Befuddled, the blue-eyed man stated, "Yes. I already told you that I understand you not wanting our friends to know about us."

"No, not that. I mean what happened on the trail."

"Oh, that."

"Yeah, _that_."

"Yes, I'm o-okay with that. I enjoyed it," Heero admitted with a raging blush. "D-did you?"

"Pft, yeah," Duo grinned and tugged on Heero's shirt to make him lean and finally close that remaining gap.

Snuggling together lifted most of their insecurities for the time being. Once the movie ended, Duo talked Heero into watching a psychological thriller – no blood and guts – and they continued to cuddle under the comforter Duo pulled over them. Warm and cozy, the heat began to build in another way. Heero's left hand pressed precariously against Duo's upper thigh under the blanket. In return, the violet-eyed man had his right arm around Heero's shoulder, thumb drawing lazy circles, their heads touching lightly.

Taking a bold step, Duo turned his attention away from the movie and softly drew his lips up the column of Heero's tan soft neck, breathing out intentionally. The response he got was favorable. Heero gasped, shivered, and arched his neck to give Duo more ground to play with. Pressing his mouth more firmly along the palpitating vein, he kissed and licked along skin offered to him. When he got to his earlobe, Heero moaned at the overwhelming sensation. It was _so_ hot, and Duo's shallow panting was a pornographic symphony ringing loudly in his eardrum. Tracing his tongue behind the shell of his ear, Duo drew the lobe into his mouth and nipped at it harshly. Heero whimpered and flinched, but didn't ward off the treatment. He'd come to learn that Duo was a biter.

With Relena, Heero never did anything with his hands until she physically placed over her breasts, but with the violet-eyed man he didn't feel any hesitation in groping his dick over the jeans. Inhaling sharply, Duo placed his mouth back on the others throat and attacked it with kindled fervor, biting and sucking earnestly. It pleased him greatly to know that Heero wasn't going to shy away from the appendage that made him a man. It gave him hope. The assault on his neck lasted longer than he could handle, so he removed his hand from between Duo's legs, shoved it under his side, and pulled Duo to lay atop him. Complying, the violet-eyed man rested his full weight on the body below. Heero wasn't sure what it was but having that heaviness pressing down on him was erotic in its own right. Face to face, they ventured into making out heavily, opening their mouths wide, sliding tongue against tongue, gasping for air during temporary detachment.

Heero sank his fingers into that loose, waterfall of hair at the back of Duo's head to deepen the kiss. His counterpart pushed his hips down for friction, wiggled a hand between them and tweaked Heero's right nipple harshly through the grey shirt.

Pulling back and thrusting his head into the pillows, Heero breathlessly asked, "You like to play rough, don't you?"

Nipping along his jaw Duo hummed in the affirmative. "Am I," he husked, "being too aggressive for you?"

"Please, as along as you don't shoot me again I'll be fine."

That made Duo laugh, a rumble that vibrated from his chest against the man below him. "Does that mean I can stab you?" He joked.

Tensing his thighs and rolling his hips upwards, the Japanese man answered through clattering teeth, "Yeah, you can stab me alright. With that."

Groaning, eyes rolling back in his head, Duo vainly tried to restrain himself. "You're so…so," he fought for the right words. "Malleable and submissive, why is that?" He didn't particularly care for the reasons. In all of his fantasies Heero was aggressive and demanding, a stark to reality which only heightened his arousal.

"I dunno," Heero mumbled into Duo's shoulder as he nipped at him through the shirt.

Loving the continuing dialogue, Duo pressed, "Oh come on, tell me. Is it because you're a virgin?"

Brows pinching together, Heero revealed, "I'm not a virgin."

"Hmm," he hummed. "But you told me you never had sex with Relena."

"That's because I didn't have sex with her," Heero intoned monotonously. Happy tension fading fast, quickly replaced with apprehension for where this topic might lead.

Teething the collarbone, the American asked, "Who was your first?" The change in atmosphere and Heero's lack of reciprocation had yet to dawn on him. That is until Heero didn't say anything. Pushing himself up, Duo peered down at Heero who glared at the left wall. A sinking feeling caused his muscles to tighten and all excited heat sucked quickly out of the room. What had he said? He wasn't trying to make his friend uncomfortable, but he'd clearly done something, said something wrong. On the verge of apologizing, Heero cut him off.

"It's one of those things that has to do with my past that I don't want to talk about," he explained. Looking up into concerned violet-blue orbs, the Japanese mans features relaxed, a deep despair wafting in Prussian blue eyes.

Duo knew that look. Had seen it in his own mirrored reflection for the longest time. "It's okay," he soothed. "I was…I was raped too."

Eyebrows shooting up, lids opening widely, Heero belted, "I wasn't raped!" All sensitivity for the personal matter gone in a flash only to be replaced with guilt for being so harsh.

That defensive outburst made Duo lurch back on his knees, ending all contact. He scooted to the end of the bed and folded his legs Indian style while still facing Heero. "Well, obviously I was," he shot back curtly.

"I'm sorry," Heero apologized, pushing his back against the headboard. "I didn't mean to be so, so, so…"

"So rude?"

"Yes," he admitted quietly, guiltily.

Duo waited for him to say something more, but that didn't seem likely. So he asked, "So?"

"So, what?"

"Well now you know my 'first time'. I think it's only fair you share yours."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because it's bad."

"Seriously?!" Duo shrieked, anger getting the better of him. "Worse than being raped at ten years old, are you fucking kidding me?"

Staring at his friend in shock, Heero had never seen Duo's rage directed at him in such a fashion. He didn't think he could return the honesty, dreading it would end their entire friendship, undo the bonds that had brought them together. Frustrated, Duo punched the bed and was half up, intended on stomping out of the room when Heero blurted, "Alright! I'll tell you!" It only seemed fair, even though it was a childish notion that Heero should respond in kind with his own story.

Taking a deep breath, Heero summoned all his control, restraint, and courage to speak the truth. Fixing his gaze on the wall, mindfully avoiding Duo's ever expressive eyes, he began to speak. "I was…I was…retrained…"

"Yeah, that much I know," Duo responded indignantly.

He ignored the comment and forced himself to continue. "I was retrained…and part of that process included sex...sexual coercion." His voice broke along with his heart at the end of that confession. Saying it aloud for the first time made the weight of the truth unbearable. Reluctantly, his eyes filled with tears while waiting patiently for Duo to tell him to get the fuck out and never speak to him again.

For a moment Duo forgot to breath. _/…sexual coercion...as in rape training?…/_ Nausea twisted his stomach into painful knots, imaginary claws dug into his heart. It was so sick. So wrong. His shoulders began to shake, and for the first time in a long while, he was truly afraid of Heero. Fear or not, he had to ask, "Did you want to do it?"

"No!" came the swift, angry answer. "T-th-they m-ma-made m-me." The unfortunate stutter from his childhood gained new life in his ferment.

"How in the fuck does someone make you do that?"

Tearing his eyes from wall, holding back the tears that threatened to fall, he yelled, "By putting a shock collar on you that sends ninety volts of electricity through your system with an added shot of adrenaline so you don't pass out! That's how! I withstood it for as long as I could, okay! I was twelve, weak, tired and hungry! I co-co-couldn't t-ta-ta-tak-take it an-an-any-anymore!"

Like a taut spring snapped loose, he shot up and bolted from the room, sprinting for the front door, forgetting his clothes that had finally dried and car keys, he would run home, but he was tackled in the living room.

Face down on the carpet, Heero vainly fought the sobs that finally gained purchase and escaped. Arms wrapped around Heero's chest, Duo squeezed with all his might. Tears of his own began to trickle down his face to fall into Heero's hair. "It's okay," he beseeched. "You're not the monster you think you are. You're just a fucked up person. Equally as fucked as me."

"I'm the exact opposite of you," he sobbed.

"I don't think so," Duo argued, resting his cheek on the soft hair. "You didn't want to do it, right?"

Heero shook his head.

"Did you ever use that training?"

Again, the Japanese man shook his head.

"Then you're nothin' like the animal who abused me. You're good, Heero. You're a good person who's done great things. You may have blood on your hands, but so do I. You're good, you're good…" his litany continued softly until the man below him ceased to weep and tremble.

Duo hung tightly to Heero, afraid that if he'd let go Heero would make a break for it. He couldn't help but cry along with him. He'd never seen Heero, the "Perfect Soldier", so undeniably vulnerable. The whole experience added more cracks to his already tortured, misbegotten heart. That moment of fear was ill-founded, and he could see now that the pain of being raped and forced to rape were parallel. Cringing, he wished they had met in a different life under happier circumstance, but what was would always be. It was clear that this past incident was one of the many reason why Heero and Relena didn't work. How could she ever understand or sympathize with such a thing if she'd never been on either side.

After a long while, Heero tearducts dried out. He murmured solemnly against the carpet, "I should go."

Squeezing tighter, Duo countered, "Stay."

"Why?" Heero muttered.

"Because I want you to. Because I need to you to. Because I think you need it too…We'll go to work together."

"But that might raise some questions."

"I don't care," Duo assured. "Let everyone insinuate their own conclusions and gossip. Just please…stay."

"…okay," he whispered upon a breath.


	4. Chapter 4

Backwards

Convincing Heero to stay and spend the night proved to be the best thing for the both of them after the evening's disturbingly painful revelations. The rest of the night was spent in comforting silence with the television on, the volume turned down low. Duo gave Heero the physical distance he required and waited patiently until the Japanese man initiated contact again.

Between warm sheets they talked idly about Heero going to therapy. He'd toyed with the idea reluctantly over the years, and it seemed that finally his tortured past needed to be approached, but Duo couldn't be his counselor, his keeper. He didn't have all the answers.

"Have you ever gone to a therapist?" Heero asked with his face half buried in the pillow, television screen casting muted blue light on their faces creating interesting abstract shadows.

Duo chuckled. "Been to a therapist? I've been to like six."

"Does it help?"

"Not at first. It takes time. Are you scared to talk to a perfect stranger about your history?"

"Scared? No, but I think I rather set myself on fire."

Duo laughed loudly causing Heero to smirk. "Please don't do that. I dunno if I'd be turned on by the smell of charred flesh."

Well in the early morning hours they fell asleep, TV left on throughout the night.

For the first time in a long while, Heero's inner alarm clock didn't go off and he slept until ten thirty in the morning. Waking up, the Japanese man smiled against the back of Duo's head. He'd never played "big-spoon, little-spoon" and found the cuddling rather soothing. Noticing the level of sunlight shining through the blinds Heero jerked up right and pushed Duo's shoulder.

"Duo! We're late for work!" he yelled and thrashed about to get out of the bed.

Clutching Heero by the crook of his arm, Duo yanked him back down and informed, "We aren't going to work today. I already called in for the both of us."

"I've never missed a day of work!" the blue-eyed man complained.

"I know. It's a crying shame that you're not going to get that perfect attendance award this year. Oh wait, we aren't in elementary school, and I think playing hooky for one day will be good for us," the sleepy violet-eyed man pointed out as he rolled over and snuggled up behind Heero for his turn to be "big-spoon".

Heero grumbled but didn't verbally protest. What good would it do? What was done was done. So he asked, "What are we going to do?"

"Ever spend a selfishly lazy day in bed before?"

"No."

"Cool, then that's what we'll do. Go back to sleep."

"I can't go back to sleep. I can't believe I didn't wake up earlier!"

"It's probably cuz sleepin' in my bed is like sleepin' on a cloud, and knowing you, your bed is probably stiff like a brick."

Rolling his eyes Heero huffed out a sigh. The man behind him was right about one thing; his bed was sinfully plush and cozy. A cloud indeed.

Somewhere on the floor beneath a pile of rain-perfumed clothes, Heero's cell phone vibrated in the pocket of his jean cut off shorts that he had worn on their hike.

"Could you grab that?" the Japanese man asked.

Reaching over the edge of the bed, Duo rummaged around and clutched the cellular device. Without looking at the caller I.D. Duo slid his thumb over the touch screen and answered for Heero.

"Hello, you've reached Heero Yuy's phone. The Perfect Soldier can't take your call right now. You're speaking with," he dropped his voice to a throaty dark grumble, "the God of Death," and then returned his voice to its normal cheery cadence. "How can I help you?" Duo grinned at Heero who rolled his blue eyes. He hadn't meant for Duo to answer the call.

"Duo?" A feminine voice squeaked.

The unbraided man's smile fell at the voice on the other line. "Hey Relena," he drew out each word a couple of syllables. Heero ducked under the comforter to escape. Placing the phone against his shoulder, Duo muttered, "I have half a mind to Dutch oven you."

"If you do that then you will die the most painful of deaths," Heero threatened while peeking out from under the blanket to glare daggers at the other man.

Duo snickered and returned the phone to his ear. "What was that 'Lena?"

"Where's Heero? I called his office today, but he wasn't there. Is he sick or something?" she asked very concerned.

"No, he's not sick. We had a little sleepover last night and decided to skip out on work today."

"A sleepover?" Relena squeaked. "H-ho-, um. How was that?"

Duo's eyebrows pinched in confusion. "Uh, fine."

"Did you two, uh," She laughed nervously, "sleep in the same bed?"

"Yeah," the violet-eyed man croaked. He sent Heero a wide-eyed, lips forming a strong frown expression that seemed to say 'this is getting weird' – an expression only a long time friend could decipher. Heero mouthed 'what is it?' back at him.

Relena coughed and inquired, "Did you guys wear pajama's or just sleep in your underwear?"

 _/The fuck is happening to me right now?!/_ Duo screamed in his head. "Uhhh, underwear."

"Th-that's cool," the Vice Foreign Minister stammered, paused and then continued, "So what, um…what kind of underwear were you guys wearing?"

Violet orbs bulged out of their sockets, but without missing a beat Duo sarcastically indulged, "Well I wore black laced women's panties and Heero had on the sexiest green banana hammock. Dude can rock a thong like no other."

"What the fuck, Duo?!" Heero yelled and yanked the phone from his hysterical friend. "Relena, none of that is true!"

"So you didn't sleep in the same bed?"

"Yeah we did tha-"

"That's _so_ hot."

"What?"

"The two of you in the same bed. It's a nice mental picture."

"Umm…"

Duo leaned towards him and whispered, "Bro, she's totally getting off on the idea of us. How fuckin' strange is that?!"

"I have to go, Relena."

"But wait! We're supposed to talk about getting back together."

"We aren't getting back together. I told you, I'm dating Duo now."

"Stop lying to me Heero Yuy."

"I'm not lying to you," he assured.

"…So, you're really dating him?"

"Yeah."

"You're gay?"

"Looks like it."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I'm still figuring it out."

"I don't know if I believe you."

"Well, it's the truth."

"Prove it."

"How?"

"Send me a picture of you two kissing."

Heero pulled the phone away from his ear as if it had been a hot coal that burned him. _/Who is this chick?/_ He wondered since she didn't seem to be behaving like the woman he knew so well. "Seriously?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes. Send me a picture of you and Duo kissing _on the mouth_ and I'll believe you."

"Fine," he stated and hung up the call.

"What's up?" Duo asked excitedly, clapping his hands erratically because he couldn't contain his hilarity if he tried.

"She wants a picture of us kissing."

Laughter boomed from the American as he fell onto his back. "I have a better idea," he giggled, "Let's send her a short video of us making out."

"NO!"

"Yes! It's the least we can do for her. I stole you away and she's obviously turned on by dude on dude action, so let's give the lady what she really wants."

Heero made squeaking noises of disbelief in the back of his throat as Duo grabbed the phone from his hand. Fiddling with the smart phone, the unbraided maniac brought up the video recording app and scooted close to other man sitting in his bed. Holding the phone at arm's length, Duo pulled Heero by the scruff of his neck and mashed their mouths together. It was only when the Japanese man eased into the kiss and opened his mouth when Duo tapped his thumb over the record button. Nipping at Heero's bottom lip got Duo the ammo he wanted, a sensual soft moan and he ended the video.

"Eleven seconds of one times two going Relena's way," he chuckled and proceeded to text the video to the blonde woman.

Heero muttered as he buried his face in his hands, "I can't believe we just did that."

"I know," Duo chuckled. "It's fuckin' hilarious."

The phone beeped with an incoming text notification. Reading it allowed, Duo just couldn't control his laughter, "This is what she said: O M G, so hot I'm soaked. I wish the best for you two." His laughter consuming him, the violet-eyed man rolled off the edge of the bed and onto the floor. The blue-eyed man groaned painfully in response.

For the next few hours their phones were placed on silent mode in avoidance of any more weird unwanted calls. They spent the time talking on a different kinds of 'get to know you' levels with basic light-hearted questions like "what's your favorite music", "what's your favorite weather", and "if you could go anywhere, where would you go"? It amazed them both that even though they'd been friends for so long, they had never discussed such normal, trivial topics. The only time one of them left the bed was to either use the restroom, or Duo would get up to retrieve snacks and drinks because he refused Heero the will to remove himself from the bedroom.

"My legs are getting stiff," the Japanese man complained.

Chuckling, Duo added, "Yeah, I'm getting _stiff_ too."

The not so subtle innuendo wasn't lost on Heero. Rolling his eyes and reaching over the bed to clutch one of his shoes from the previous rain-soaked day, Heero bashed, "Maybe this will help you with that!" And he smacked Duo's arm with the shoe.

Rolling off the bed, Duo grabbed his long combat boot and smirked. "Oh yeah, soldier boy? Well then, take **this**!" He boasted as he hit Heero with his own shoe.

In a fit of laughter, both strong men hit each other repeatedly with their shoes and thought nothing weird of it. The shoe fight went on for a while until the bedroom door suddenly opened and in stepped another person. Duo, always handy with knives, grabbed a switch blade hidden under the pillows and popped it open. Heero, without his gun, raised two scary fists below his chin in preparation of an attack. What happened next neither of them expected.

There in the doorway stood their friend Wufei, confused and amused.

The Chinese man had gained enough insight on the situation to ask, "Is this the manly alternative to a pillow fight?"

"What are you doin' here, 'Fei?" Duo sighed, closing his switch blade and placing it back under his pillow. Heero in return unclenched his fists and the pent of tension in his frame eased. Duo was beginning to regret giving a copy of his apartment key to each one of his friends - something they all did in case of emergency so access to their homes would be easier than busting down the door or hopping in through a window.

"Neither of you answered your phones when I called," he shrugged. "Honestly, I was more worried about Yuy since he has never missed a day of work, but I can see now that you're rubbing off on him, _Maxwell_."

Throwing his arm up in the air, Duo admonished, "Ya know I can't get 'Ro to do anything he doesn't wanna! He's here buh-cuz we're havin' fun and takin' the day off."

"Yuy never takes the day off," Wufei deadpanned and glared at Heero.

"Well actually," Heero started and cut himself off. Realizing that he was about to unceremoniously admit to the previous nights revelations his mouth ran dry. "I was…I wuh…I w-wa-wu-was." What happened to his carefully constructed filter?

Discerning that stammer and trepidation, Duo interrupted, "I was havin' a god awful night and our buddy 'Ro decided to stick by my side and help me through it." He smiled and gave Heero a meaningful look that claimed, 'I got you. Don't say shit and just follow my lead.'

"Ye-yeah," Heero agreed and constructively twisted the truth. "He opened up to me about his past and was too torn up to go to work this morning, so I thought it best to stay with him." Feeling the weight of guilt, Heero's shoulders slumped.

"He's such a good friend!" Duo boasted as he shook Heero's shoulder.

Wufei didn't buy it for a minute. His observant training kicked in and told him that he was being lied to. But he didn't say anything. There was a strange tension in the air that he couldn't place his finger on and he knew that calling them out wouldn't explain much.

"Yeah, okay. Just be at work tomorrow or Une will have a fit," the Chinese man warned and exited the room, closing the door softly behind him before making for the front door.

As the front door closed with a soft, muted _click_ , Heero turned to Duo and stated, "You've got big ass balls for lying to Wufei like that."

Duo shrugged. Lying was against his principles but under the right circumstances he would twist the truth. "It's true," Duo admitted sarcastically, "My balls are so big I can't buy underwear."

Heero simply stared at Duo with a blank face before hitting him with his shoe again. "You're an idiot!"

Well past noon, they both lay entwined together on the bed and watched irrelevant shows and movies to pass the time. Heero had yet to experience such a carefree day, and that he was sharing it with Duo made it all the more comfortable to handle since his constant go-go-go frame of mind had a difficult time of laying back and appreciating the little things. Sly, soft, tender touches with tips of fingers grazing over goose bumping flesh were frequent and welcomed.

When Heero became restless, Duo allowed him to move about the room but not leave. At a laugh filled point in the day, the blue-eyed man had Duo sit on his back while he completed sets of push-ups with claps between every up-lift. If anything that reminded Duo that no matter how larger or bulkier he got, he'd never harbor the deceiving strength Heero had. But that didn't bother him or bring insecure feelings of self-doubt, Heero had been genetically altered after all.

Laying side by side, Duo's head at the foot of the bed and Heero his counterpoint resting the opposite way, they'd been talking amicably about the war and what had become of them since when Heero noticed the time – half past five – and decided he needed some time alone to figure his thoughts and feelings out.

The workweek progressed normally, so to speak. Quatre kept a vigilant eye on his two friends, desperately wanting to gossip and trying to figure out how Heero and Duo were developing their new relationship. Wufei knew something was different but kept his questions to himself. Trowa…well, Trowa didn't notice anything out of the ordinary except for his own boyfriends' strange excitement whenever Heero or Duo came by.

Tuesday proved to be a stressful day for the blue-eyed man thanks to talking semi-candidly about his past for half an hour to a complete stranger where he kept his gaze stubbornly fixed to a spot of the carpeted floor; his first therapy session. By the end of that ordeal, the psychologist suggested they meet three times a week – Monday, Wednesday, and Friday – for hour-long sessions. Needless to say he wasn't looking forward to the continuance, but he'd give it a try and hope that in the long run something good would come of it.

After work the next day and his first hour-long session, Duo sensed Heero's discontent and encouraged him to take part in a task they both enjoyed: shooting targets at the Preventers underground firing range. Fifty one-manned stalls lined one side of the massive room and a long stretch to where the targets were displayed on the other. Using standard issued 9-millimeter pistols they empty multiple ammo magazines into black-silhouetted figures. For the braided man it was to help his friend release his tension, but for Heero it became a quasi-mission. Each cartridge of bullets was shot into the imaginary face of one enemy or another from his tortured pre-war life. Some of their names long forgotten, buried deep in his subconscious in effort to abandon painful memories, but their faces remained in his mind's eye. The other scientists whom were part of Doctor J's team, the ones that called for his retraining and dehumanization were the people he symbolically killed with an entire clip of slugs. By the end the Japanese man felt better, but he knew it was only temporary. Removing the safety glasses and earmuffs – policy for using the range – he realized Duo was standing behind him, smirking kindly with a question in his eyes.

"Feel better?" the violet-eyed man asked.

Heero shrugged and grunted.

"Rrrr, me Heero, me cave man, rrr," Duo mocked in hopes of getting a snicker from him.

And it worked.

"Shut up," Heero chuckled, placing the glock on the shelf by the empty magazines.

Something possessed him to grab the braided man by the collar of his Preventer issued jacket, yank him close, and mold their mouths together in slightly bruising kiss. In the heat of the moment he didn't know what gripped him, but it was yearning for physical comfort and a distraction only Duo could provide.

The stall wasn't that large and lacked a door but it kept them hidden from prying eyes and security cameras. With Heero's tongue trying to crawl its way down his throat, Duo forgot he still held a gun in his hand and when he went to reach for blue-eyed mans neck to deepen their impromptu make out session, the heated metal grazed Heero's neck causing him to pull his head back and gasp loudly.

"Sorry, sorry," Duo apologized, "It's not loaded anymore." He hastily dropped the gun besides Heero's on the metal shelf, cradled his head in both hands, fingers meshing into soft dark brown hair, and continued the awesomely fun activity of sharing saliva.

The brief encounter with the gun increased the heavy smell of gunpowder in his nostrils and his blue eyes remained fixated on that weapon. Duo bit down on his bottom lip playfully, simultaneously ground his thigh between Heero's legs, eliciting a low throaty groan.

"God you're fucking hard as rock," Duo mumbled against Heero's parted lips, teasing his leg against the Japanese mans fully charged arousal.

Thrusting his hips to inflict the same torture on Duo's groin, the blue-eyed man whispered, "Pick it back up."

"Hmm?"

"The gun."

Violet eyes appraised the weapon curiously from his side vision, looked back into hungry Prussian blues, and then picked it up and placed the barrel along Heero's neck, the muzzle rubbing behind his ear. His breath hitched, pupils dilated, thighs tightened around Duo's leg all thanks to the warm metal and echoing gunshots from others at the opposite end of the room. Lost in rapture, he clutched the braided mans hips with both hands to force them to undulate together with more pleasurable pressure. Witnessing Heero behave wantonly threw Duo into his own lust fueled frenzy. Attacking the free side of his neck, Duo sucked and nipped at the sensitive flesh. Moving his hands down, the braided man used his left to grope Heero's backside and the other to stroke the guns barrel along his throbbing cock. The sensation of a lethal weapon rubbing against his manhood evoked another gasp to fall from the blue-eyed mans kiss swollen lips.

Chuckling darkly, Duo teased Heero's ear between his teeth, muttering, "I should have known you'd have a fuckin' gun fetish."

"It's new to me," he responded in a quivering voice.

The titillating reality that Heero's sexuality was being discovered and him experiencing Duo in intimates in ways that were _new_ to him made the braided man think of his partner as having a facet of innocence. That thought ignited his excited passion like dry brush exposed to the hot flames of hellfire. The gun adding kink to the intoxicating mixture, Duo gave into the dominating side of himself and pressed the muzzle of the gun under Heero's chin, lifting his head back.

"Hands against the wall," he ordered upon a whisper.

Completely fogged by their promiscuity Heero followed Duo's command and placed his wrists against the wall beside his head. Violet staring into blue, blue staring back into violet, the dark heady need increased as Duo worked on Heero's belt. As quickly as he could, the braided man undid both their pants, retrieved their weeping cocks from their confinement and stroked them together with his free hand. Heero withered beneath his touch and almost brought his hands down to help, but his counterpart pressed the pistol under his chin with more force as a silent warning. Duo stroked their dicks together at a painfully slow pace, watching Heero's face for every minute change and was graced with his hearing his breathing become more shallow, shaky, his cheeks turned a soft pink, blue eyes unable to focus on one particular spot, continually rolling back behind his lids.

He pleaded, "More."

"Shut up," Duo murmured, attacked his mouth to silence him even though he hadn't requested loudly; the ringing gunshots surely would have covered their sounds, but Heero was letting him take the reins and Duo wanted nothing more than to exploit that.

Mouths caressing, Duo picked up the pace for a few minutes, bringing them closer to the edge before he abruptly stopped. Heero growled in dissatisfaction, glared at the grinning braided man who commanded, "Touch me."

Free to use his hands Heero copied Duo's actions but the one holding the weapon lodged the gun firmly under his jawbone and instructed, "Just me."

Following orders Heero masturbated his friend like he would himself, straight forward and to the point, lacking prolonging techniques, but that didn't matter. Right here, right now, wasn't meant to go slowly. Their mouths collided again and Duo fondled Heero with equal intensity and urgency. The skillful rough hand brought him closer to climax than he anticipated.

Duo gasped, "I'm close. Imma come on your shirt if you don't aim my dick at the floor."

"Where would you prefer to come?" Heero asked, nipping savagely along his jaw.

"On you," he groaned, eyes soaring to the back of his skull, balancing on the brink.

The blue-eyed man lifted his button down shirt and tie up high on his chest, exposing his defined abdomen to the air with his unoccupied hand. Strangled gasps and repressed groans escaped Duo's throat, his entire body went stiff as he exploded across Heero's stomach. The heat of Duo's cum running down his skin made the blue-eyed man whimper, lions constricting.

Never one to forget the needs of another, Duo increased the speed of his hand over Heero's cock, flicking his thumb over the moist tip, utilizing every trick he knew to get him off equally.

The muzzle of the gun pushed his head back further, forcing him to peer at the ceiling.

"Three," Duo whispered in his ear, breath tickling the shell.

Heero began to thrust back into Duo's hand.

"Two."

The _click_ of the hammer being pulled back echoed in his eardrums, making him inhale sharply.

"One," Duo whispered hotly, pulling the trigger.

The following _click_ caused Heero to ejaculate, his essence spreading across his own skin to mingle and mix with Duo's. He trembled violently, knees buckling as his orgasm cocooned and rocked his body, panting moans no one but Duo could hear.

When it was all said and done, Duo dropped the pistol back onto the shelf blindly as he sought out Heero's lips to capture his quiet sounds of release. They rubbed against each other, the sensitive post-orgasmic flesh making them whine and satiated, the sweat on their bodies cooling.

"We needa clean you up," Duo mumbled, his forehead resting heavily against Heero's. The Japanese man hummed in agreement, too tingly to articulate real words. The warmth of their cum began to dissipate, the chilled air having that affect when Duo suddenly bent at the waist and took a long swipe across Heero's chiseled abs with his tongue.

Gasping, the Japanese asked, "Why'd you do that?"

"Cuz I wanted to know what you and I taste like together," Duo answered, smacking his lips together. "We should clean you up," he repeated and proceeded to wipe the man-naise off of Heero's abs with his jacket sleeve.

"Ew, you can't wear that now."

"No shit Sherlock. Imma wash when I get home."

"We should get out of here."

"Yeah. See you tomorrow?"

"Sure."

Duo grabbed Heero by the neck for one final kiss and bid him farewell.

The rest of the week didn't go as smoothly as they would have hoped, their new circumstances created a foreign dynamic between them that we were less capable of hiding.

Lunch on Thursday proved to be a little uncomfortable. Dorothy had official business to attend to at the Preventers Headquarters, and while she ate her meal alone in the cafeteria she glared daggers at the braided and Japanese men who sat with their three close friends at a near by table. Relena had told her about how Heero had broken off their relationship _over text message_ and was now supposedly dating Duo. She didn't buy it for one second.

Irritated with being scowled at, Duo asked loudly, "What's your beef, Dorothy?"

Her forked eyebrows pinched further together, wrinkling the bridge of her nose as she said nothing and chewed her salad slowly.

"You wanna piece of me?" Duo taunted, knowing well why she was glowering at him. "Get at me," he added, thrusting his shoulders and smacked his chest.

Dorothy remained silent and added another fork full of lettuce to her mouth.

Turning back to his friends the American snickered, "Girlfriends gotta serious case of bitch-face."

This made Heero choke on his water, a decent portion snorted from his nose. Everyone at their table laughed at his expense as he hid half his face behind a napkin and continued to cough. Due to their lofty budding affection, Heero found himself smiling and laughing more often at Duo's antics than he ever had before. The warm, fuzzy honeymoon phase was gaining quick momentum. The previous days exhibitionist experience left them both yearning for more. It hadn't even been a week since they agreed to date each other, but Heero could already feel the switch that should have been flipped during puberty finally flick to 'on'. Late bloomer or not, the sexual awareness had the Japanese man eager and hungry for more.

Our two questionable lovers kept a friendly distance and cordial co-worker façade around others, hoping no one who already didn't know of their current status would be left unaware.

Late Friday morning, almost their lunch break, Heero and Duo were standing in the break room drinking coffee with Wufei. The braided man chattered away at the speed of lightning about something Heero wasn't giving an ounce of his attention to. His focus was on Duo's face and his wild gestures, but the words fell on deaf ears because his mind was connecting the bridges over why it had been relatively easy to form this new dynamic to a long existing friendship. They were both cut from the same cloth, so to speak. They suffered many of the same travesties during the war. They both thought like soldiers, valued the same honorable characteristics in each other: honesty, loyalty, respect. The touching and the kissing hadn't been hard to adjust to at all either. Duo had been one of the most tactile persons he knew, the other person being Relena. The increased level of physical contact was much more easily accepted, wanted and returned than he had ever experienced with his now ex girlfriend. And the kissing, _oh_ , the kissing. Duo kissed so much better than Relena, and when Heero gave some real comparison he recollected that the Vice Foreign Minister kissed like a toad. She had this awkward movement with her tongue wherein she would thrust it repeatedly into his mouth like a frog trying to catch a fly, very unnatural and not all arousing. He still wasn't sure if he was gay and that didn't really seem to matter anymore because at least with Duo, he was.

The violet-eyed man said something about getting back to work, drawing Heero out of his fuzzed, happy mind and back to reality.

Without thinking, Heero set his coffee cup on the counter said goodbye to Duo and kissed him on the mouth. The braided man eased into the kiss naturally but a strangled cough made their eyes pop open and stare with fear at each other. They had forgotten for meaningless second that Wufei was present in the room.

They pulled away quickly; Heero slapped Duo on the shoulder and said, "See you at lunch."

Turning his attention awkwardly to Wufei, he did the only thing he could think of to keep their Chinese friend from asking questions or inferring anything. Heero walked up to him, mumbled his name, cupped his face in both hands, and planted a quick peck on Wufei's mouth before pivoting quickly on his heel and marching out of the break room.

Alone with a silent, horror-stricken Wufei, Duo chuckled and threw his arms up in the air and boasted, "It's this new European thing we're tryin' out!"

He grabbed Wufei by the back of the neck only to have a hand slapped over his mouth and Wufei hiss, "Don't you even dare."

Duo pulled back and ushered out a fast, "Okay, bye!" before practically sprinting down the hall to Heero's office.

He slammed the door behind him and leaned heavily against it, waiting for Heero to stop his speedy typing and look up at him. That didn't happen.

"Well, that was weird."

"What was?" Heero asked.

The braided man snorted and proceeded to holler, "What just happened in the break room, that's what!"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Heero said calmly, eyes never leaving the computer screen.

"You just KISSED _Wufei_!"

"Shut up! Don't say it out loud! I'm trying to remove it from my memory!" Heero pleaded.

"Aw, come on, it couldn't have been that bad," Duo chuckled.

Heero murmured, barely moving his lips, "It was awful."

"Worse than Relena?"

"I would rather kiss her a thousand times over than do that ever again!"

Duo rested both hand on Heero's desk, sighed heavily and theorized, "Well, I think your little stunt threw him off our trail."

Heero shook his head and insisted, "Wufei's not that dumb."

"I dunno. He wouldn't let me kiss him."

That finally got Heero to look away from his computer for a split second. "You should get back to work," he directed.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't want to be seen hangin' around each other too much. Appearances and all."

"Does the secrecy bother you?"

"Nope, not yet at least. It's kind of like we're in a covert mission on the home front."

Duo went back to his office to work for an hour and a half before their lunch break.

At the table Wufei kept eyeing Heero and Duo suspiciously. Quatre seemed to pick up on Wufei's tension but didn't say anything. Trowa didn't notice a damn thing. Duo acted as normal as possible, and Heero consumed his lunch at a record-breaking pace, all in attempt to get back to his office and hide for the rest of the day.

Throwing away his trash he had every intention of making a quick exit and said a polite goodbye to his group of friends, but Wufei interfered with his plans by teasingly asking, "Aren't you going to do that European thing?"

"What?" the blue-eyed man asked, confused.

"The kiss thing," the Chinese man pointed out.

Heero groaned inwardly and muttered, "Oh…right…yeah."

He made haste going around the table starting with Duo, then to Quatre who laughed against his mouth, and then to Trowa who was shocked and taken aback by the quick peck.

Wufei put up his hand to block Heero and requested, "Don't do it again to me, please. Ever."

"Sure, no problem. Okay, bye!" And he swiftly vacated the cafeteria.

The table was silent for a minute except for Quatre chucking behind his hand. Duo bit his tongue to keep from joining in but couldn't ward off the smile.

Trowa looked around the table flustered and then asked loudly, "What the hell was that?!"

The blond man laughed out loud, turned to his boyfriend and said, "Heero kissed me."

"I know! I was there! What the fuck was that about?" The green-eyed man was lost in a fog of utter confusion.

"Apparently, he and Maxwell are doing this new European way of saying goodbye," Wufei informed.

"Yup," Duo added. "I should get back to work so…" he leaned in to kiss Quatre who leaned into him as well, playing along with the deception, but his boyfriend tugged him back by the shoulder.

Duo opened his eyes to find Trowa holding a clear plastic knife under his nose and ordered, "Don't even think about it!"

"Okay, sorry!"

"And don't kiss me either!"

Duo left the table not bothering to even try to kiss Wufei and sought out the elevator. He was a little miffed that Heero got to kiss everyone and he hadn't.


End file.
